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NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
Something bad is happening. I’m scared. Need someone to help stop my head, to stop scared feeling. Need to be better. Everything hurts feels lost alone hopeless painful lifeless 


  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Sending huge hugs Natalie <3 Do you want to talk about the bad thing happening, or any more about those emotions (e.g the hopelessness)?

    It sounds really awful. Can we do anything to help?
  • Lucy307Lucy307 Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Just wanted to echo what Kathleen said above, we're here to help support <3 do you want to talk about what's going on? @NatalieMT

    Sending hugs <3
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
  • coc0maccoc0mac Posts: 1,054 Wise Owl
    Just echoing as others have said above and sending you hugs and support. We are all here for you, and are ready to listen whenever you would like to talk :heart:
  • PoppyBPoppyB Posts: 228 Trailblazer
    Hi @NatalieMT I thought I'd check in to see how you are feeling today? 

    As others have said, we are all here to listen and support you in whatever way we can <3 You are doing the right thing by reaching out on the boards, so well done  :) If you feel comfortable, would you be able to say a bit more on what's causing you to feel scared, lost and alone? 

    If you feel like you need further help, please reach out in any of The Mix's Support Chats or call The Mix's free confidential helpline on 0808 808 4994 
  • NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
    I’m scared of New Year’s Eve, of the bad things that could happen. 
    I want to say but I’m scared to here. I haven’t talked about it without needing to, 
    I feel vulnerable, and I feel like I’ve one big internal knot stopping me. 
    Can you be trapped by fear? Is it ok to say it, what makes it ok to say it?
  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,031 Boards Guru
    Hey @NatalieMT

    It's understandable to be feeling scared and vulnerable. Reaching out for help and sharing our true feelings can be a really scary thing to do. It's always okay to share here, we won't ever judge you. We're all here to listen and help you through this always. <3

    Do you mind me asking what you're feeling most scared about? 
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
    edited September 2019
    I’m scared that it’ll all become too much to bare, that this year I won’t be able to cope or get through it, I attempted to end my life December 2018, the build up to what is just a date, all became too much. I wasn’t the strong person anymore. My key person saved me, stopped me, made me see I had Darcey who didn’t think I was a bad person or hates me. It was Darcey I was here, I got past the date, carried on with the court case.

    The difference this year he’s in prison, should feel safer, but fear has set in and so has the same scary thoughts. 

    I am scared I will lose my mind/control. 

    I’m tired of the control he has over my thoughts, my being, some days I’m just Darceys mother, others I’m this thing a monster hurt and not good enough.

    On New Year’s Eve, I was 13 he tricked me, bad things happened, I was drunk, had drugs (not to my knowledge, I was unable to focus, to move myself, and I don’t know how much I can say about it here? If it’s allowed? I wasn’t in control of my own body. It was like I was unconscious, I don’t remember everything from that night, but what I do remember terrifies me. Makes me physically sick and unwell.

  • NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
    I wasn’t in control of my own body 
  • GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    *hugs* hope you are doing ok
  • NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
    I’m here and alive, thanks

    I hope your ok 
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