My Feelings

Former Member

Hello! This is for me to share my feelings as saying it to someone makes me feel better. Some comments may not need a reply, so its ok if no-one adds to this but me, however help would be nice!

I struggle with 
- Eating alot of food when I'm bored or upset
- Spending upto 7 hours a day on my phone
- Friends thinking I'm too perfect and hating me so I only have one friend
- Feeling bad and depressed for all of the above

I really want to try to stop the first two so any tips would be nice 

Former Member

Today I have spent 6 hours on my phone and only 1 of them has been productive. When I was younger I loved writing stories but now I can only think about my phone and it makes me upset I want to stop it but without it I'm bored. 
Don't really want to go back to school, you always have to pretend to be happy otherwise people think you're moody and don't like you, and its so hard keeping that up. You try to interact, but being with someone that half likes you is really tiring, and laughing at jokes which aren't funny is so exhausting.

Former Member

I've got a similar problem with eating a lot when you're bored or upset. I want to stop too so maybe we can motivate each other :P

I have a few tips. One would be to try and find replacements. For example, if you eat when upset as a distraction, you could try playing a video game or going for a walk, or if it feels comforting, you could wrap yourself up in a warm blanket. Another thing is eating mindfully and slowly. I also find it helpful to sip on a drink instead. Do you think any of those could help you?

About being on your phone a lot, have you got any activities you can do to occupy yourself? My advice might also be to slowly cut your phone usage. So maybe you could try to limit yourself to only five hours a day, then four, and so on. Is writing stories something you'd like to do again?

Is there anything in particular that makes friends think you're too perfect, do you know? I can't imagine hating you because you seem like a lovely person. It sounds lonely to only have one friend.

I understand not wanting to go back to school. Those things do sound exhausting

I'm glad sharing your feelings with someone makes you feel better. We're always here, sending hugs

Former Member

Thanks @Past User its nice to know someone understands
I have never actually thought of those before so next time I get a craving I'll look back to your post. I would love to motivate you too! 
I would love to write again and roller skate again maybe but appart from that I have no other hobbies.
The wierd thing is I dont get why they hate me. I used to be friends with lots of people but a girl I used to be friends with turned everyone against me. I asked someone about her but all they said is I'm too perfect. Its really hard because I get good grades but no-one notices the really depressed side of me 

Former Member

@Past User gave some really great advice!

Both of the hobbies you listed sound great! If I find myself really engrossed in something I barely look at my phone.

Have you thought about maybe setting yourself time limits for your phone? I didn't realise how much I used mine until Apple added the "screen time" feature. I lot of smartphones come with time restricting features so you can set limits for yourself on certain apps, or ration how much time you have a day to spend on your phone.

You say you want to write again. What sort of things did you write before? Is there anything stopping you from picking up that hobby again?

Former Member

Hello @Jordan
I have got the feature but I always ignore it 
I used to do stories in calligraphy and cards with poem messages. I think the only thing that stops me is that I know it's more fun to just watch things on my phone instead of take the effort to write my ideas, but I do get engrosed once I've started.

Just an update with my eating I am going out for a meal later with friends so at snacktime I tried to only have a smoothie intead of a chocolate bar and it has fulfilled the urge so far! It feels better when I know that there's people motivating me so thank you all 

Former Member

Really well done with your eating! I hope you enjoy your meal later

Former Member

Hi @ClaraOswald
I think it's great the way you have shared your feelings in this thread as a way to feel better. I completely agree that just telling someone can be a huge relief, so I'm glad you decided to share it here!

Firstly, that's great that you had a smoothie rather than a chocolate bar! and I hope you have a lovely meal later I have a huge sweet tooth and one thing that I like to have rather than chocolate is frozen grapes or frozen banana - have you tried those before? They remind me of ice lollies or sweets, and they take a little longer to eat because they're cold, but they're healthy at the same time! 

That's so cool that you are able to do calligraphy and poems - you seem very creative! I totally understand it can be difficult to motivate yourself into artistic things when phone entertainment is so much more accessible, but I really believe you can get back into those things! My friend actually has an art instagram account where she posts photos of her artwork, along with updates along the way, and sometimes people even request her to create things for them. This could be a fun thing with your talents, as you are still on your phone for a little bit, but it will also motivate you to do the stories/calligraphy/poems so that you can share them later! How does that sound?


Take good care!  

Aoife

This is really great progress @ClaraOswald! Keep us updated with how everything is going.  

With the time you're spending on your phone, I was wondering if you'd seen any of the media/technology detox challenges going around Instagram or Pintrest before? Some of them are really great because they set you small challenges each day of the week. We actually did a media detox challenge on the boards a few weeks ago which challenged you to reduce the time you're spending on your phone/social media. Is this something you might find useful? 

Former Member

All the suggestions are so good and I will definately try them out  
I saw the media detox challenge from @Aife and will try it tomorrow which will also be nice as I am going back to school so hopefully will start some good habits. 
Im going to try showing some of my calligraphy on my insta because then I'm combining both the things I like, I love the idea @coc0mac ! 
Thanks so much and will keep you updated 

Former Member

This is my first 
Hope its ok!

Former Member

Wow @ClaraOswald, your calligraphy is beautiful - you are so talented! I love the positive message as well You have a real skill, thank you so much for sharing it here I love it!  

Former Member

I did it again
I was writing an important document and even though I saved it, it all deleted, so I got very stressed and ate alot of food and now I feel bad again

Former Member

Hey, please try not to beat yourself up over that I understand feeling bad and it sounds like it's really challenging for you to avoid eating when upset. Look at your post about managing to have a smoothie instead of a chocolate bar - you did really well and you can do this.

I hope you're feeling a bit better now? Let us know how things go, I'm rooting for you