Trigger warning - half rant and half about perssure and body image

Dancer

TRIGGER WARNING. PLEASE ONLY READ IF YOU DO NOT GET TRIGGERED WHEN SOMEONE TALKS ABOUT BODY IMAGE. 

I know that I really should be asleep but I can't sleep. I don't know who to talk to or what to do.

My friend is so triggering and really does not help me. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I was messaging her about how I feel fat after I had dinner. I feel like I am such a fat, disgusting hippo (no offence to actual hippos.) Is it right that a 13 year old (or anyone) feels so fat, self concious and like they should go on a diet? She said I have no meat on me, I need to eat, that I am a stick and other stuff that is supposed to be nice. How is calling someone a stick a compliment? Please tell me. I understand that it might sound nicer than being called fat but it is still very offensive and triggering to me.

I feel like there is way too much pressure for people's body image to be a certain way. I found out a lot more about that when Sexplain UK came to my school on 22nd March to talk about body image. We had to make collages out of fashion magazines which made me feel very uncomfortable because a lot of the models are soooooo slim and they are much, much, much, much prettier than me. I even had a chat with one of the volunteers from Sexplain about it and she agreed that there is too much pressure.

It has left me very stressed and unable to sleep.

I am writing this from my bed at 4:30am so you can guess how bad my sleep is. I have been awake since 2:15am. Why do I always have to be the one feeling like this? Why does anyone deserve to feel like this? 

Written by a very tired, upset, ugly, blobilised stick figured hippo (aka Kasa.)

[title decapitalised by moderator]

Former Member

Hey Kasa

I'm sorry you're feeling like this, and are insecure about your appearance

It's totally understandable that what your friend was saying is offensive and triggering to you. It sounds like she does have good intentions, and probably thinks it's a compliment. But I can totally get why it would upset you.

You and the Sexplain volunteer are right in that there's too much pressure. And you got me thinking: we sadly live in a society where being fat is frowned upon and insulted, and being thin is the beauty standard. In my opinion anyway, what's wrong with either? The only bad thing about really fat, is that it can lead to poor health (that risk's also there if you're really thin). Beauty-wise, though different people may have different personal preferences, all bodies are acceptable and beautiful - and I think all the unnecessary pressure and judgment is wrong, and needs to change.

I hope you got a bit of sleep in the end and that you're okay

Former Member

Hey Kasa, 

Sending hugs

It sounds like your struggling, so it's very positive you've posted to reach out for support. We are here for you.

Have you spoken to anyone else about how your feeling?

Did you manage to get some sleep?

Dancer

Stephanie said:

Hey Kasa, 

Sending hugs

It sounds like your struggling, so it's very positive you've posted to reach out for support. We are here for you.

Have you spoken to anyone else about how your feeling?

Did you manage to get some sleep?

Thank you for the hugs. No I didn't manage to speak to anyone or get sleep. At least I have people that I can trust and talk to.

Jellyelephant

Hey Kasa,

body image is a tough one - there is lots of influences such as the media that can make us feel bad about our body! One thing I try and remember is all the good things our body does, its pretty amazing actually when you learn how the body works! Your body lets you run, do trampolining, see pretty sights, hear music, communicate with other people and much much more. Pretty cool right? I follow an american therapist on instagram (@heytiffanyroe) and (@bodyposipanda) and they talk about self love, self acceptance and intuitive eating - which I have just started learning about. Its the idea of allowing your body to tell you what it needs and not cutting out foods/restricting. I'd really recommend looking it up if you have time. I find that it helps me to surround myself on social media with accounts that are positive and help me feel good about my body. I have unfollowed all the dieting accounts now and people who made me feel like I should look a certain way. It really helps! 

x