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Lost & fearful

NatalieMTNatalieMT Posts: 177 Helping Hand
When I’m on my own, it’s silent, with no distractions thoughts come creeping in, thoughts that quickly escalate me and lead me to feeling powerless, scared.
I am afraid of my own mind and my thoughts. 
The negativie thoughts consume me, it is literally feel like your in too deep in the sea panicking to get to the surface but the powerful ness of the waves moving you take over and before you know it your sinking further to the bottom, but at the bottom there sinking sand, if you get that low your not going to make it or survive.
I feel so empty inside and numb but my head is filled with worry of flashbacks, snippets come into my head, they hold onto me, remind me be fearful of things around me, worry for losing control in some way.
someone just rattle / shake me really hard. 
Sorry

Comments

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Hey Natalie <3

    Sometimes i think trying to fight the waves of bad thoughts can make things worse. And i aint saying ignore the thoughts/waves either as that just tryin to mask it and would be pretty hard esp if feels like youre drowning in it. But accepting them and letting them pass through your head actually gives you more control to it. Cause well i can imagine if someone is panicing when theyre in the sea and trying to take more control of the waves theyd start struggling more. I guess is sometime how bad things are & how we can manage them. (Obviously really hard to not panic - thought thought id say tho)

    I also always wonder how feeling so empty feels so heavy 


    (Not completely relevant to this - but i think youre very self aware of your feeling & that you explain how youre feeling, well)

    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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