Not having any freedom and independence

Sholay09

Hello I am 20 years old going to be 21 years old in April this year and I am feeling really angry with everyone saying unhelpful and negative things to me when I only want to be more independent and have more freedom as I am now a grown up and when I say that I only want to be more independent and do more things for myself because unfortunately nobody else is going to take care of me at all. I am really sick of the same situation and abuse still going on and I really want this to end now as I also only want to have more control and power over my own life, learn more life skills and do more things for myself like look after myself more and to get on with my life without anyone trying to control me or tell me what to do, put me down, say things like I am only young as this makes me even more in rage because I am only asking people to treat me how I should be treated. I just wish that everyone would finally listen to a lot of things that I say a bit more properly like to change and improve things for me and to treat me how I should be treated like every other individual and to not do or say certain things to me anymore.

Kathleen07

Heyyy bud,

Sorry to hear this, your feelings are understandable. It can be angering/upsetting when others treat you like that:( I'm wondering if anyone in particular (e.g family) is acting that way? xo

Sholay09

Well yes kathleen0172 it is everyone that is treating me differently like telling me to still get on with life as normal without any right support for my mental health and when they say unhelpful and kind things to me like when they say that I cannot expect people to help me if I start to behave in a certain way when they still should do because a lot of people do behave in a certain way like self harm, get angry, show other emotions like sadness, throw a meltdown/tantrum and have other sorts of behavioural support. People should not say things in which are not right like if I keep worrying myself all the time that I am not going to get any support when no one should be saying something like that to me at all as that is definitely treating someone very wrong and unfairly and that everyone should understand everyone and agree with what I am saying for once and that people should finally listen to me a bit more and to treat me how I should be treated and how I ask them to treat me as something like that should always happen. I feel like I don't know what to do anymore to be honest.

Kathleen07

Sending hugs, that does sound really difficult People shouldn't put you down like that.

It's obvious their words hurt and anger you. How does it make you feel (like does it make you doubt yourself, feel alone, want to hurt them...)?

It also sounds like you're worried and stressed about the support situation, is that true?

Much love  

Sholay09

Yes it is true that I am still stressed about a lot of things including not having any support yet and waiting for it. Also I feel like lashing out at people for not listening to me and respecting my human rights as everyone has rights and should have more freedom to do what they want no matter how things upset some people sometimes as long as I am not hurting anybody at all then I should be allowed to behave as much as I like and be who I am as nobody is perfect.

Kathleen07

Hm...:( I had bad anger problems some years back so I can understand feeling like lashing out. Also you're right in that nobody's perfect, and of course you want others to respect your rights xo

About not having any support, how would you feel about trying something like The Mix counselling services (link: http://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team/the-mix-counselling-service). It's not long term and I'm not sure if it's something you'd wanna do, just thought I'd suggest it in case.

You mentioned being stressed about a lot of things, is there anything else you want to talk about?

xo

Sholay09

Well yes like when people should understand that the world should change for the better and that we should not have to live in a world when everyone has different vocabularies of words, not being allowed to do what we want to like behave in way that we want as it is our right and choice in how we want to behave and have fun as long as we are not doing anything wrong at all or opinions sorry to say that but when it is about certain things like when I say that humans are animals when humans are actually in fact animals themselves because they have a life cycle, reproduce, eat food and drink water and do other things that other animals do even though humans are very different from other animals and I just wish that everyone would see things in my point of view for once about certain things and they never do about anything at all and that is bad. Also I really want something like medication, services, places and many more that would finally work or be for everyone.

Kathleen07

Sounds very frustrating for you Sholay