Stuck in a tunnel on the train

SkyeIsNotTheLimit

Hey

I've had depression for a while now, well I have BPD. BPD, to me, feels like being on a packed tube during rush hour. It's all cramped at one minute but then the next stop so many people get off and I can breathe again. Truthfully I've never been as stable as I am now because I've really changed my lifestyle. I have hobbies, work, friends. But today I feel low.

One thing with BPD is difficulty with relationships. I have a crush on a real guy and the last time that happened I got overly obsessed and it was horrible. Think Crazy Ex Girlfriend if you've seen it. I'm scared this will happen again because this guy is not datable due to our ages and honestly not each others type. I've turned into a teenager again lol.

I just wanted to vent my anxieties and explain what BPD is like. I'll probably get over it soon but right now I feel like I'm on the worst train ever.

Skye

Aidan

Hey there Skye,

I hope venting has helped you! It's some bravery to be so honest and open to others about yourself. I'm sorry to hear what it must be like for you.

On a positive not though, you've got an analogy for BPD that works for you so I hope this helps you understand and come to terms with things, as much as it helps others understand.

Sometimes trains are busy, and sometimes they're full. They can be late, on time, cancelled, be replaced by a bus- they're temperamental, but you can still get from A to B one way or another. 

Take care,
Aidan

Shaunie

Hey

interesting to hear how BPD feels like for you. I read today that there are 256 combinations to BPD which was interesting at how differently can affect people.  I have BPD and i Understand the unstable relationships part. But It’s great that you feel you have found some stability in your life. Which does show you have learnt ways to manage your emotions better so maybe you can apply that to other aspects to your relationships. I’ve learnt some ways to manage my emotions that I learnt in dbt, like making pros and cons list, problem solving and mindfullness and just thinking before I act/speak has helped a lil bit with my relationships