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It’s all my fault
Former Member
The Mix convertPosts: 226 Trailblazer
So next Thursday will be three years since the death of one of my best friends and I am still struggling to get over her death and understand why she did it. I still kind of feel responsible for it and that I should have done more to help.
The amount of people who have told me to “just get over it” and that “she is dead now so there is no point in crying” is unreal and just makes me feel like I’m being stupid and shouldn’t feel like this.
I hardly slept last night because I spend the night crying and trying to not wake anyone up. I actually think I’m making myself Ill with the stress of everything at the moment and don’t know what to do.
The amount of people who have told me to “just get over it” and that “she is dead now so there is no point in crying” is unreal and just makes me feel like I’m being stupid and shouldn’t feel like this.
I hardly slept last night because I spend the night crying and trying to not wake anyone up. I actually think I’m making myself Ill with the stress of everything at the moment and don’t know what to do.
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Comments
I’m so sorry to hear about your friend! It seems like you’re going through a really rough time! Your feelings are always justified and even if people say “just get over it” as you mentioned, that doesn’t mean you have to explain yourself if you don’t want to.
Everybody experiences grief differently, and it is a difficult process for many! There is no right or wrong way to act after experiencing the death of a close friend. The Mix has some articles on the grieving process like this one: http://www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/looking-after-yourself/grief-and-bereavement-6290.html . Cruse (mentioned in the article) offers a helpline for people to turn if they have experienced the loss of a loved one, you can ring them at 0808 808 1677. Also, you can search their website for other services they provide like face to face support: https://www.cruse.org.uk/cruse-areas-and-branches .
Alternatively, another link on The Mix offers advice on grief counselling and what to expect when going in to talk to a professional: http://www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/looking-after-yourself/getting-grief-counselling-6696.html .
Hope this helped!
Vidhya @The Mix
If im honest im really struggling but im getting through it. I have looked at the links that Vidhya left (Thanks @vidhya) but havent reached out to them yet. I was too scared.
Hope you are okay too?