help! i think i might have depression

Former Member

hi!
​I'm just going to say it right away: I feel absolutely terrible. i have felt like this for over a month and i feel just bad all the time. i was looking through some stuff online when i saw a post talking about depression and things that show that you could have it. lots of the things listed applied to me. so I'm pretty sure ive got depression, but i cant talk about it with anyone. i don't have anyone i trust enough to talk about it with and i really don't know what to do...
​sometimes i will wake up at 4am and i will be so tempted to just run away to get on a plane or something. sometimes i will randomly start to panic and i start to feel dizzy and i feel like I'm falling.
​i cut myself sometimes and I'm really trying to stop but i don't have enough control over my own body any more to stop myself. i know i need help but i don't know how to get it.
​does anyone else hav any ideas of ways for this to get better or am i just going to be secretly depressed and stressed out for the rest of my life?
​thanks for any replies

Former Member

Therapy is a really good way to improve your mental state, I think everyone should do it as we all have so many feeling and thoughts locked away and we need to talk to someone. You can have complete trust in a therapist as they are legally required not to share any information, and if they do then jokes on them bcz they’re in prison. I think that I’ve felt that I’ve had depression before but I’ve never gone as far as to cut myself which is such a horrible thing to do. You really need to stop doing that as it’s completely unnecessary and it could scar you, as I’ve said I’ve never done it so I don’t know the reasons why you’re doing it but I think it’s very wrong. Being secretly depressed and stressed is obviously an awful way to live your life, I don’t know the relationships you have within your family but talking to a parent or sibling is a good way as they are there for you. I also know that therapy is pretty pricey so maybe talking to a family member is the best option. If not then there are plenty of people here, and me, who you can talk to and everyone is here to help
If you want to talk to me about your problems I’d be really happy to help, I’ve felt similar before and not that great at the moment tbh and I know that talking is the best way to solve your issues.

James

Former Member

There are many routes one can take for helping to deal with depression and I suggest starting small. you might find it helpful to talk to someone you know in small doses or even try the 1-2-1 chat or telephone counselling through the mix as its a much less personal way to get used to it. you may find it beneficial to go to your GP as they should be able to refer you for therapy or other helpful routes. therapy is a very helpful route and the best part is they are confidential and won't share anything you tell them with others especially not family, its in the contract they had to sign
you may also decide to get properly diagnosed by a professional and then decide against therapy which is perfectly fine and many people choose to do. it can be helpful simply to know what you have and so you can find good ways to solve or help it. especially as depression can also be secondary to something else like anxiety etc.
we're all here for you if you need anyone to talk to or have any questions, don't hesitate to ask x

Best wishes :rainbow2:

Former Member

Hey there bluemoonlight,

It sounds like you're having a really rough time at the moment and it's entirely understandable why you'd feel so hesitant to talk to people about how you're feeling. I would suggest trying to speak to your GP about how you're feeling since they will almost certainly have different options for things that might help you feel better, even if it's just talking things through and getting it off your chest.

There are also a lot of resources online that you can look at to help better understand depression and mental health in general such as Mind https://www.mind.org.uk/ and Rethink https://www.rethink.org/ which you might find helpful to look through.

You also mention that you don't have anyone you trust enough to talk with, is there a particular reason why you feel this way?

I hope this helped.

- Riley

Former Member

thanks for the advice. u said about going to my GP, but I don't know how I could do that because I'm too young to go by myself. also I can never tell anyone other than anonymous people online how actually I'm feeling for some reason. I never really open up to anyone. a while go my mum sent me to councelling sessions because my dad died but I didn't actually need it then because for a weird reason I wasn't even upset (I'm not a bad person).
​I don't really trust anyone, and people tell me that my friends and family are always ther for me, but my family are never there for me in that way.i basically cant say how I feel to anyone I know or have met face to face and I have no idea why.
​thanks for trying to help anyway tho

Former Member

I know how it feels about not being able to open up to anyone, when I use to lie in bed every night listening to my parents fight it felt horrible but I never said anything and that made it worse. I obviously don’t know the situation with your family and I’m really sorry that your dad died but having trust in your family is something you definitely should try. Your mum and siblings (if you have any) all love you loads and ik it’s akward talking to siblings so it’s probably best to talk to your mum about your problems. Your mum has spent her time raising you for your whole life so clearly she loves and cares about you sooooo much. You should trust her as she wants you to have the best life that you can and talking about your issues with someone face to face is a great way to put your problems behind you and move on.
And obviously as you said that you’re fine opening up to people on here so you can talk to anyone on here whenever you have a problem
I really hope that you can find someone close to you to open up to as I’m sure they’ll help you through whatever problems you are going through
Hope this helps a bit