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Night club groping

One-in-a-millionOne-in-a-million Posts: 606 Incredible Poster
Just wondering how people deal with being groped by strangers in a night club. I used to love a night out and would always enjoy myself but since my diagnosis of epilepsy I've had to tone it down a bit with the drink.

So now it can sometimes be hard to enjoy myself when I'm sober and surrounded by drunk people.

I was out last night and some gut on the dance floor was dancing near us and asked a lady who was with us (didn't know her, she was on her own so we let her tag along with us) if I was her daughter. She laughed and said no. He caught hold of my hands and started dancing with me. I would normally be ok but it just felt weird. Another woman watching came over and pushed him away from me and asked if I was ok I said I was.

My friend, me and this girl were about to take a picture when my mate invited him over. He put his arm around me (no big deal) but then he squeezed my boob. I wasn't ok with that but didn't say anything. He then squeezed my bum again I wasn't ok with that but didn't maya fuss and just shook it off. He caught hold of my hands again and started dancing. I juat sort of stood there and tried pulled my hands away. He then whispered in my ear "shall we go outside?" Shocked I said no and when he asked why I said "I don't want to." And pulled away harder this time.

He stopped bugging me after that but just kept looking at me with a slight scowl. He kep dancing with the lady who joined me and my friend and the were french kissing (she seemed into it so whatever.)
But It felt awkward for me he just kept looking at me.

I also find it hard going out now. I don't enjoy as much now as like I say I don't get drunk now cus of my medication so my the time my mate(s) are bladdered im still sober so when I'm ready go home my mate(s) aren't and a few times I've ended up going home alone.

Anyway back to the situation how do you deal with being groped when out at night. It had happened quite a few times but last nights was worse than what I'd experienced before

EmmaXx

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Emma I dont have any advice sorry but i wanted to say that me and my friends have dealt with similar. People just dont respect boundaries sometimes especially once they have been drinking. Hope someone has some advice for you soon.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 52 Boards Initiate
    Hi Emma

    That sounds like a really unpleasant experience and unfortunately quite a familiar story. It is never ok to touch someone in that way and you made it clear that you were not happy with it. Some people tell a staff member or door person about it but this does not guarantee that they will do anything about it, some people call the police on 101 and report it but again it is not always with a guarantee that anything will be done. It is also common that people don't do anything about it and avoid people or places that it has happened.

    What I would like to make clear is that is is not ok and there is nothing you did to deserve this or encourage it. Being touched on the breast or bum can be considered sexual abuse and sexual harassment and is against the law.

    If it happens again, what do you think you would do?
  • One-in-a-millionOne-in-a-million Posts: 606 Incredible Poster
    Thank you both for your replies.
    I'm feeling ok about it now but it does ruin the night I know some people say it's normal and it's just one of them things but why should we put up with it?

    I know some people blame it on how people dress I believe that because on the night I was wearing a decent top and jeans with boots so no one can say it was provoking but I know it doesn't matter how people dress anyway.

    I can't really say what I'd do if it happens again like you say some bar staff don't do anything anyway. Normally I just ignore it but that doesn't make it any less uncomfortable.

    Thanks anyway guys
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