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People wrongly assuming that I share their devotion(s)

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
edited January 2023 in General Chat
A problem that I've encountered many times is that someone chooses to start a conversation with me by talking at length, in detail, and with strong feelings - about something that they have a very strong interest in. They then wrongly assume that I'm just as into it as they are, then quickly become angry with me and show contempt towards me when I truthfully and politely say that I have no interest in it. This has happened to me from different people, every year, since my childhood, in regard to many things: sport (especially football), particular TV shows (especially Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad and The Walking Dead), getting drunk & having fights, consuming particular food & drink, doing particular hobbies etc. They're angry with me and look at me like I'm an alien from a distant planet because I don't do as they do. I've been told things including: "How can you not get drunk at the weekend? That's what weekends are for!" " Which football team do you support? ........ You don't watch football - are you a faggot or something?!" "Are you up to date with Game of Thrones? ............ You don't watch GoT! How can you not watch it - it's the best TV show ever!" and "You don't drink tea?! How can you not drink tea? I could never go a day without drinking tea!"

Why do they assume that I share their obsession(s)? Why are they offended and angry that I don't? Why do they look down on me and insult me for not being into those things? I'm not insulting them and my non-participation in their interests doesn't adversely affect anyone. Why do they view a strong interest in those things as compulsory and a failure to devote myself to those things as deficiencies on my part?
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Sometimes people often get real caught up in their hobbies or devotions because it means a lot to them, they can tend to forget that just because it changes their life doesn't mean it does for someone else. we all have different things that makes us happy or keeps us going and it's not the end of the world if someone likes something else, its completely not your fault and if they get angry i tend to stand my ground and say "sorry i'm more of a (insert hobby here) person, but i'm glad you have something you really love" be assertive, it's not your fault that you don't particularly like something and you shouldn't have to be treated badly because of it x

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