Talk about friends

Former Member

Who else has no friends?
Like I really haven't. I live in a house with 5 other ladies but I wouldn't call them friends and I have a befriend (so she volunteered to be friends with me a while ago but we've decided that we just want to carry on seeing each other now) but we live far away from eachother now too so only see her once every few months now + she is pregnant now and due in 5weeks. The last time I saw her was before Christmas when she came to Birmingham and I'm going to see her in Hereford in a fortnight. I had a phonecall with her the other day but she very rarely texts back too. So she's not there like a friend.

I'm the kind of girl who has had a best friend A few past friendships have been like this..(feel free to talk about your friends you have fell out with perhaps too)
A girl who got a boyfriend and then didn't want to know me. So I said bye bye.
A girl I stole with so then our mums wouldn't let us see each other.
A girl who I wanted to surprise her for her birthday all she had to do was pop to the shop so I could go round and put balloons and banners up (me and her mum was in on it) but she refused to go to the shop and I know it was her birthday but I just wanted to make it special for her so I felt a little bit let down and then I was going to take her out on her birthday night but she got a tattoo done in the day time and very last minute she said she didn't want to go out as her tattoo hurt. I asked if she wanted to just spend the night in and have drinks she said no. It turned out the tattooist that did her tattoo slagged me off to my friend and then my friend became friends with my bullys. So I said bye bye.
A friend who I met in a hostel we didn't really talk in the hostel but she got kicked out and I saw her by the front door with bin liners and I helped her carry the bin liners to the libary (if I didn't she wouldn't of had all of her stuff) I waited 3hours in the libary with her while she waited for her social worker (and in that 3 hours that is when we really got to know eachother) so we became friends. We were in very similar situations so I understood basically in her flat she let her cat wee and poo all in her flat and it was really bad. She couldn't live there, like I couldn't live in my flat because I made it get so bad. So anyway one night we stopped in her flat and we both deep cleaned it so much! and she borrowed £30 off me (fags,takeaway,sweets and alcohol) we had. I met her a week or so later at a train station for her to give me my money back and she refused so all I done was picked up her hand bag and she started punching me. So I said bye bye.
My latest friend hasent bothered with me since I moved from Worcestershire to Birmingham. So I said bye bye.

One-in-a-million

Hi lostsense sorry to hear how you're feeling lately. I've had friends like that in the past and it can be very upsetting.
I really wish I could say something helpful and give you some advice but unfortunately with everything going on my head just feels messed up with different thoughts and feelings


I still stand by what I said before, I'm glad I met you on here

EmmaXx

Former Member

Hi lostsense, I think we've all known people like that. My friend of 11 years abandoned me and two of our other friends for some weird guy she was seeing and started talking crap about me to others and saying stuff like I should "get over" being abused
I've learnt toxic people aren't worth having, if someone is decent they will change their behaviour around you, even if they seem hard to find

Distraction

Hey, it's best to let go of these people, theres just no point having them around, my lastest friend fall out is a person I knew since I moved to Scotland (7 years) we were school friends, she got a boyfriend and I was dropped like a potato, after not really talking or seeing each other for about a year, she asked me if I wanted to go to a family party last night, I thought it would be good, just to see where we stand and I found out pretty fast that I had been replaced, her mum and dad said they missed me and I should visit them, but I don't think that's going to happen.

Another friend is just so hard to get on with, everything is about her, don't get me wrong she asks how am doing and stuff to, but it's all about what she wants to do and I go along with it but when I suggest something it's a no, no

So now am left with three frineds in college and they never want to seem to meet outside college, we have done a couple times but it always seems like am the one trying, so I gave up and we'll see what happens with that.

So ye, just let them go, you'll find better people, that's what am hoping on anyway, it can be sad and lonely but keep looking up for the future

Former Member

Thanks for sharing your friendships too and yep I have let go of those friendships now..I don't need them😊

Former Member

I've had people pretend to be my friends. I wish I were able to quickly work out how to tell the difference between a real friend and someone who pretends to be in order to trick me into trusting them so that they can victimise me, exploit me or use me as a last resort to kill time with when they're bored and everyone else whom they know is busy.

Former Member

Hello Lostsense, sorry to hear how poorly you have been treated by your 'friends'. I had bad experience with my 'friends' too where they chose their relationship partner over me, and as soon as she was struggling she came running back to me. Its hard finding the right crowd of friends, but soon you will find the right friend who will stand by you. Just like me, found my true friend, 3 years and strong!

Former Member

Thanks

Former Member

zaynah wrote: »

Hello Lostsense, sorry to hear how poorly you have been treated by your 'friends'. I had bad experience with my 'friends' too where they chose their relationship partner over me, and as soon as she was struggling she came running back to me. Its hard finding the right crowd of friends, but soon you will find the right friend who will stand by you. Just like me, found my true friend, 3 years and strong!

Yes, a lot of so-called friends only want you when they want your help - or only want you in their lives when they're inbetween relationships, inbetween jobs etc. These on-and-off friends aren't real friends.

Former Member

I know.