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Meeting with Store Manager on Saturday- Could lead to losing my job!!!!

Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
On Saturday at 3pm I have a meeting with my store manager because I have been accused of harassing people by constant messages sent to them. I only sent them messages because I needed some advice about what I was going through and whether work should be aware and now its led to this meeting on Saturday which I'm scared could make me lose my job if he doesn't think my reasoning is good enough. I am allowed to take someone into the meeting with me just to make sure its fair but I'm worried if I do that then the person will think I'm a bad person for getting in this much trouble. the person I'm thinking about taking with me does know some of the stuff I'm going through so that might help. I'm worried because 50% of my wages go to family because of whats going on at the moment so it wont just effect me but my family a lot.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Were you sending text messages to your colleagues during work hours? Were the texts work-related or to do with your life outside work?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    It was outside of work hours and it had no link to work
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't see why your colleagues have complained about you to the boss, nor why he's getting involved. What happens outside of work and is unrelated to work is irrelevant to him. Your colleagues should have talked to you about this outside work.
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Yeah neither do because it's got nothing to do with work! Yeah they should have spoken to me if they had a problem with it instead of getting work involved. I'm scared for the meeting and also I have reasons for contacting the members of staff!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You might want to take someone with you to the meeting. You can tell your boss during the meeting that the complaints against you are irrelevant to work, so he cant take action against you for it. If he does punish you, ask the Citizens' Advice Bureau for advice about it.
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    I'm taking one of my supervisors with me to the meeting who knows what I'm going through! He has seen the messages that have been sent though and obviously thinks it's harrasment but it's only because I needed advice on whether I should tell them what's going on and now I don't feel I can talk to anyone at work which is making me feel so much worse about what's going on! What will that company do?!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What exactly is the problem with the texts? The number of them? The content of them? Is there anything in what you sent that could be considered threatening or insulting?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    The number of texts that I've sent and there is nothing wrong with the content because there isn't anything work related! No
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    An update to this situation is I have decided to resign from my job because I need to be there for my family right now through the difficult time that is happening right now
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    JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,309 Part of The Furniture
    Hey Laura,

    I get the feeling that's not the outcome you were after, but it does sound like it might be quite a positive move overall to be with your family. :)

    The Citizens' Advice Bureau was a good shout by Robert - they can give you legal and financial advice and information around things like this. Not sure if that's relevant to your situation any more, but thought I'd elaborate just in case!

    Best of luck with things, it sounded like quite a tricky and unfair situation. *hug*
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Quitting means forfeiting any chance of a settlement or the opportunity to take action if unfairly suspended/dismissed.

    Does quitting a job make it difficult/impossible to claim Jobseeker's Allowance? Would the Benefits Agency say that you deliberately made yourself unemployed?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Hi Mike, Thanks for getting back to me. I have decided not to hand in my notice quite yet, instead ive expressed my feelings about work with a manager and they are trying to sort the situatin out. My family feel I should keep the job but it was me that felt I needed to leave to help them more. I will continue to help my family as much as possible, it got back at work on Friday because I cried infront of my supervisor because everything was getting to me. Yeah I might have a look at that service thanks. Thanks and yeh things are tricky at the moment.
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Hi Robert. I decdied not to quit and ive expressed my feelings with work and they are trying to sort out the issue. I will continue to support my family and work but if work don't sort out my issues then I will still leave
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You said that the texts weren't work-related, so what problem do you have at work?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    how I'm being treated by a manager and something that I'm freaked out about that has happened recently
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Did the thing that freaked you out happen at your current workplace and was it something that another current member of staff did?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Yeah the thing that freaked me out happened at my current workplace and yes it was something another member of staff did. Sorry if I have slow replies from now on sleepy and need to go to bed and I've got a busy day so I'll reply when I can
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    AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Would you be able to tell us a bit more about what freaked you out, so we have a better understanding on what's actually going on for you right now?
    You mentioned the meeting was down to someone reporting you for harassment which as you understand isn't acceptable in any workplace, at any point do you feel as though you had made the other person feel uncomfortable, distressed, etc? - Like, you're unlikely to loose your job, unless their is actual evidence showing that you have harassed another one of your colleagues.

    Maybe the reason they didn't approach you was, was due to them being worried about you? How do you feel when you're at work, are you able to do your job to the best you can, despite what you're going through?

    Do keep us updated on how things are going, let us know how the meeting goes.
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Hi WhispersofTheHeart thanks for the reply. I was freaked out when my supervisor told me that the security guard fancied me and he is at least 20yrs older than me, its also weird because I got a valentines card and at first I didn't think anything about it but now I know that the security fancies me I'm wondering if its from him. Ive reported the whole situation and work are currently investigating it!!! I know that its not acceptable for anyone to feel uncomfortable at work so I understand why they reported it, I had a meeting about it and I will know the outcome by this weekend. I'm trying to do my job the best I can but I'm going through stuff outside of work as well so its hard to at times.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Did you receive the Valentine's card at work or at home?

    Were the texts that you sent to your colleagues about the security guard and/or the Valentine's card - or were they about something else?

    Do you know if your supervisor is telling the truth?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    yeah I recived the valentines card at work. about something different. work are investigating it and I will find the outcome out by the weekend the manager told me today
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I still don't see why your manager is involved in the complaint about you sending texts to your colleagues outside of work, that were not related to work. Even if what you did is considered to be harassment, it's nothing to do with work -- so how can you be sacked/suspended for it?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    I think I might be getting a second chance considering everthing else I'm going through at the moment
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The texts you sent are a separate issue to the security guard allegedly fancying you and being sent a V-Day card. Don't assume that he sent it, unless you recognise his handwriting or he tells you that he sent it.

    Deal with the texts issue first. If they take action against you, go the Citizens' Advice to see how you might appeal that. An employer isn't allowed to dismiss an employee without good reason.
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    An update to my situation they have given me a final written warning for work. with the situation that I reported the manager they said they have considered the information and he is going to speak to the manager who is treating me like that and see what its happening. when I reported the security guard he no longer works at the store.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The security guard no longer works at the same place as you, so he's not an issue any more.

    How many people who are currently at your workplace do you have a problem with?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    no that's no longer a problem and one in particular. I aslo want to move back onto my section but they wont move me, I need a distraction because of what I'm going through.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is the person at work whom your main problem is with your manager, or a colleague on your level?
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    Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    A manager
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