Am I in the wrong?

Former Member

Basically, me and my last boyfriend ended pretty badly. Towards the end of highschool, I had been struggling with my mental health pretty bad. I had to miss a lot of school due to getting really sick but when I returned I ended up getting close to this guy in my year who I hadnt spoken to much before id left. By then I had been diagnosed with social anxiety and I desperately seeked someone who would understand what it felt like I guess. So after getting pretty close to the guy I suspected that he had the same. He struggled quite a lot and when I tried to explain to him what I thought was wrong, he wouldnt listen and reflected it all onto me saying I was the one with the issues and I needed help not him. So we would argue a lot and he would constantly put me down in front of others and broke stuff and basically kicked off a fit any time I tried to give my opinion and suggested he speak to someone ect. But it got to the point where I didnt like him anymore but when I told him that he freaked and said he couldnt survive without me. He would ring me constantly, scream down the phone threatening to hurt himself. He smashed his phone and stuff in his house. I tried to just be friends but multiple times he tried to force himself on me and when I reacted against it he would freak out and hurt himself. Anyway it got to the point where our parents got pretty concerned and his mum wanted me no where near him, she blamed his outbursts on me. But he kept turning up at my house, following my friends that I hung out with around and ect. I couldnt escape him. Til finally we finished our exams and split from highschool. My parents told me he was controlling me but I still feel like I overeacted and I was in the wrong. Anyway months had passed and we ended up bumping into each other and slowly talking a bit more. He has good contacts and keep promising to get me in touch with a band cause Ive trying to find a group to practice with. However whenever he tells me hes going to make plans, he says he got too tired to ask or forgot, which he always says he never does. But now he keeps messaging me and says hes here for me and Ive been pretty low lately, most my friends are too busy to meet and my siblings have moved out, so I keep finding myself turning to him. He keeps telling me hes changed and hes seeing someone, but Im scared Im just going to reopen the old wounds. My parents say I need to break off contact with him and I know theyre right but I feel like ill just have no one if I do. I dont know whats best.

btw sorry for the long post.

Former Member

Have you considered finding a new boy instead?