Family member going through a major operation

Former Member

I just found out that my uncle son is going through a major operation right now due to having a tumour in the bowels. I'm in shock because its all happened so quickly also worried about him.
​How can I feel better about this?

JustV

Hey Laura,

It sucks to hear about your uncle's son and I hope everything goes well with the op. Feeling in shock is totally natural though, and of course so is being worried about him.

It's hard to know how you specifically will feel better about this whole situation, but some comfort may be found in the knowledge that he's in good hands with the doctors around him. Aside from that, do you have anyone close who you can lean on while all this is happening? Maybe some close friends or family members?

Some temporary distractions might also be worth exploring; something to take your mind off what's going on. What do you like to do to relax, for example?

Sometimes it is also really worth letting yourself feel the way you feel - when bad things happen, we feel bad and that's totally okay. A good vent about it or a chance to be with your feelings can do wonders for some, rather than actively trying to feel better. Everyone's different, of course, but thought I'd throw that out there.

I hope that helps. All the best, and do keep us updated. *hug*

Former Member

Hi. Thanks for the post! His op went ok thanks but I'm still thinking about him every single day and hoping he is recovering well. I have spoken to my close friends about it and they are helping me through it. I love listening to music and going on my laptop to relax. I'm trying to keep distracted. But it's not easy. I've got work tomorrow and my supervisor can tell when I'm not myself so I'm probably going to have to speak to her about what's been going on this week. One of the managers need to speak to me tomorrow about my work hours because I'm trying to change my Sunday hours because it's hard to commit to the ones I have because of things going on. I can't pretend to be ok when I'm not my supervisor at work can see that! My emotions are just deep inside of me and I try and keep it to myself because I don't like people seeing it weak! My supervisor can see through the happiness I'm trying to show when I'm at work.
I will keep you updated on things

Former Member

Hi an update on this situation. he came out of hospital a week ago today and he is waiting for his chemo to start which should be within the next few weeks. I'm still really worried because ive had an bad experience with chemo in the past because one member of my family had it 2 yrs ago now and now doesn't remember anything and is in a care home now because she cant look after herself. I'm just worried the same will happen to my cousin although he is younger (in mid 30s) and he healthier so I'm hoping he will be able to recover from it. Is it normal to feel like this?
​Also I don't know if I should tell my supervisor at work about how I'm feeling about this situation because she knows when I'm not myself and plus she does already know about the fact my cousin has had a major op and that I was worried about him. I still am worried about him too be honest. Work have allowed me to keep my phone on me during work just in case I have any news which I appreciate.