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Depression

SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
in Health & Wellbeing
Hi im new to this. Im 18 have depression currerently getting treatmemt for anorexia. I am so sad all the time i find it hard to get out of bed and dont find any pleasure in doing anything. Although i have treatment for a diagnosis of anorexia it has turned into bllulmia, and i feel complety out of control with my life.
Ive lost all my friends because i have just isolated myself. And behind on my work at college. I feel like most days im just feeling sorry for myself and just cry all the time and just basically being really weak. But it hurt so much and i feel like im watching myself getting worse and theres nothing i can do about it. I put so much pressure on myself to be happy and be like everyone else but i cant get there no matter how much help i get or help myself. I feel so helpless and hopeless. I just dont know what to do anymore.
“And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley

Comments

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Hi Ella
    Thank you so very much for your lovely supportive reply. That makes complete sense and that could be the reason. I hope it is. Because bulmia is horrible and so tiring. I dont see my life getting better or ever eating normaly even with treatment because they wont change my therapist. But iam sure people do get better.

    I would like to meet my friends and intentionally i think i want to speak to them. But ive made plans before thinking i would go but struggle to get out of bed so made excuss. I think it obvious that i had anorexia and was at appointments more than college and they made jokes about all the possible reason why i had appointments. Ones being i was mental and on the verge of getting sectioned. Thats when i knew i couldnt admit they was right. They are lovely but some of their jokes arent funny.

    Crying ismt a weakness and i feel so much empathy when i see someone else cry because you can see all their pain. But when its me I just feel so weak.

    Thank you again for your reply and enjoy the rest of your day❤
    Shaunie x
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Hi Ella
    It is always nice to hear when people have recovered from depression, anorexia,bulmia and all sorts. But then theres also stories of it beating them and taking their lives. My therapist is alright but i cant speak in it. I just think i will be abel to open up if my therapist was female. He complety understands the reasons why but think it would help me to trust men. But i will by the end which woukd be pointless. But now im having an assessment to a personalit disorder service. Hope that could shed some answers and hope.
    They are the sort of people to want to go to pubs and clubs all the time. Which i enjoyed very occasionally but not everytime. I think they are just uneducation on the topic of mental health.

    Thank you so much❤
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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