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Anger and emotion

I'm so fuelled with anger it's mad. Just keep hearing a voice that says "I'm gona fucking punch him" I'm so clueless again about what this means. Thoughts about going out and smashing cars and windows seriously, cutting my hair evan shorter, self harming. Emotional side Lying in bed crying, sleeping. I just need to sleep that way I can't do any off these things apart from self harming. I feel I will punch anyone that gets in my way. I'm tierd, not like sleepy tierd just tierd😪 is it time to go now? I'm tierd enough. Not strong enough.

Many many reasons why I feel so much anger and emotion:
-Last session with counsellor lastnight.
-I've been told today that someone will be leaving me on Kooth (I'll still have someone else for a short while I think, however the named worker I had had on there I can't message anymore after the 30th) I've spoke to this lady for a while so I've known this one longer than the one I will be having booked chats with for a short while longer and that will evan come to an end soon aswell.
-Home treatment team transferred my care to CAMHS and not heard anything gone from like 3 visits a day to nothing.
-Home situation unsure about living in this house.
-Family situation (my aunty has cancer and we are just all worried about her for Christmas day that she won't be well enough to come for Christmas meal).

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Steph. So sorry to hear that you're stuck in such a difficult situation :( You ARE strong - you have chosen to come on here and post, which is pretty much the strongest thing you could do. Do you have anyone you can phone at CAMHS to find out what's happened to your support? I'm in the process of getting passed over to the CMHT so I can begin to appreciate how frustrating this must be :( Have you maybe considered talking to an outside voice like Samaritans about this too? They might be able to help in working out some short term solutions, until more long term plans can kick in. i'm here to chat to if you want to *internet hugs*
    http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us
  • Former MemberFormer Member Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Hey Steph,

    Just want to echo what Phoebe has already said. We are all here for you, just wanted to check in to see how you're feeling today? :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 18 Settling in
    Hey Steph,

    Thank you for posting. It sounds like you have so much going on and you’re feeling like you don’t have enough, consistent support. It’s great that you’ve come on here to reach out for support rather than letting out your anger in potentially harmful ways. Remember that The Mix’s boards are open 24/7, so we’re always here. Our helpline and 1:1 chat will also be running over the Christmas period so if you’re feeling like you need to speak with someone, please get in touch.

    It sounds like the counselling has been really helpful for you and you’re worried about it ending. What has been particularly useful about it?

    Our telephone counselling service isn’t taking referrals at the moment but it’s worth checking back in January to see if some space has opened up, if you’re interested.

    Phoebe has made some really good suggestions – if you can contact someone at CAMHS then maybe you can feel a bit more in control and find out what’s happening with your referral. I know it can be really frustrating when you feel like you’re just waiting and not making progress. Samaritans is also a great place to reach out to for support.

    What is it about your living situation that’s making you unsure?

    I’m sorry to hear about your Aunty, it can be really hard dealing with a family illness, especially around the holidays. Do you have another family member that you can share your worry with? I really hope that she is able to spend the holiday with you.

    Again, remember that we’re always here. Please keep us updated on how you’re doing.

    Sarah @ The Mix
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Phoebe wrote: »
    Hey Steph. So sorry to hear that you're stuck in such a difficult situation :( You ARE strong - you have chosen to come on here and post, which is pretty much the strongest thing you could do. Do you have anyone you can phone at CAMHS to find out what's happened to your support? I'm in the process of getting passed over to the CMHT so I can begin to appreciate how frustrating this must be :( Have you maybe considered talking to an outside voice like Samaritans about this too? They might be able to help in working out some short term solutions, until more long term plans can kick in. i'm here to chat to if you want to *internet hugs*
    http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can...you/contact-us

    Hello Phoebe,

    My support worker phoned CAMHS again this morning and I'm still waiting for them to drop me round some Lorazepam. My care co is still on holiday apparently but my support worker asked if she could speak to someone else so they put her through the to someone else and support worker said I need my lorazepam and nurse had to check with doctor she phoned back and said doctor said yes so she's going to pop a prescription around today hopefully that's what she said. So when she comes I'll catch her and ask when my next fixed appointment will be.

    Samaritans are shit
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Hey Steph,

    Just want to echo what Phoebe has already said. We are all here for you, just wanted to check in to see how you're feeling today? :heart:

    I've been feeling sleepy all day, I'm just waiting for the nurse to drop me a prescription around so then I'll go and collect them. I hope she hurry up
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Hey Steph,

    Thank you for posting. It sounds like you have so much going on and you’re feeling like you don’t have enough, consistent support. It’s great that you’ve come on here to reach out for support rather than letting out your anger in potentially harmful ways. Remember that The Mix’s boards are open 24/7, so we’re always here. Our helpline and 1:1 chat will also be running over the Christmas period so if you’re feeling like you need to speak with someone, please get in touch.

    It sounds like the counselling has been really helpful for you and you’re worried about it ending. What has been particularly useful about it?

    Our telephone counselling service isn’t taking referrals at the moment but it’s worth checking back in January to see if some space has opened up, if you’re interested.

    Phoebe has made some really good suggestions – if you can contact someone at CAMHS then maybe you can feel a bit more in control and find out what’s happening with your referral. I know it can be really frustrating when you feel like you’re just waiting and not making progress. Samaritans is also a great place to reach out to for support.

    What is it about your living situation that’s making you unsure?

    I’m sorry to hear about your Aunty, it can be really hard dealing with a family illness, especially around the holidays. Do you have another family member that you can share your worry with? I really hope that she is able to spend the holiday with you.

    Again, remember that we’re always here. Please keep us updated on how you’re doing.

    Sarah @ The Mix

    Hello Sarah, I've not seen you around before but it says you joined in 2015?😌

    That was who it was with haha! I've just finished through TheMix telephone counselling, we had a good connection and I opened up to her about lot. I'm going to miss her😢 I'm aware I can reapply in 3months.

    The nurse has just dropped my prescription around^^ haha! (I was just saying I'm waiting for someone to drop a prescription around).

    She said she's going to try and come and visit me for a routine check but she goes off and my care co comes back (she said she's emailed him) so she'll ring me to let me know of who and when is coming around.

    I'm glad I've got my lorazepam back! They said I wasent able to have anymore as they're addictive but support worker phoned this morning and told them I need lorazepam.

    Housing situation-I'm just not sure if I'm happy here.

    Me and my mum have the same worrys about my grandma and aunty.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Chemist is closed so I can't have any lorazepam tonight support worker is going to get them for me in the morning😡
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Is there a chemist open now fucking dying for a lorazepam!😡
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,329 Wise Owl
    Got lorazepam😆
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