If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
One for the guys: 'manning up'
JustV
Community Manager Posts: 5,579 Part of The Furniture
For the lads in our community, I thought it might be interesting to talk about feelings (yes, contrary to popular societal belief, males do have those 
), or more specifically, being able to talk about them.
I would imagine most of us have experienced being told to 'man up', 'sack up' or 'grow a pair' when it comes to discussing serious and/or deep feelings or even remotely suggesting we might be a bit down about something or struggling with life in some way. Urban Dictionary has it pretty nailed with this post:
Of course, it varies depending on your environment and personal tendencies, but this sort of metaphorical armor that a huge amount of males are socialised into wearing can do serious damage to health and general wellbeing. People can grow up with this notion surrounding them and then when it comes to actually dealing with things that need dealing with - or even just maintaining general mental health - men often resist talking about things and keep them bottled up inside.
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably, a support service dedicated to males) once rolled out a poster campaign to help dispel some of these social stigmas. See one of their pieces below:
What are your thoughts on these social stigmas, and have they ever had an effect on you? Keen to hear what you guys think. :chin:
), or more specifically, being able to talk about them.I would imagine most of us have experienced being told to 'man up', 'sack up' or 'grow a pair' when it comes to discussing serious and/or deep feelings or even remotely suggesting we might be a bit down about something or struggling with life in some way. Urban Dictionary has it pretty nailed with this post:
Of course, it varies depending on your environment and personal tendencies, but this sort of metaphorical armor that a huge amount of males are socialised into wearing can do serious damage to health and general wellbeing. People can grow up with this notion surrounding them and then when it comes to actually dealing with things that need dealing with - or even just maintaining general mental health - men often resist talking about things and keep them bottled up inside.
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably, a support service dedicated to males) once rolled out a poster campaign to help dispel some of these social stigmas. See one of their pieces below:
What are your thoughts on these social stigmas, and have they ever had an effect on you? Keen to hear what you guys think. :chin:
All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
The truth resists simplicity.
0
Comments
Sounds like this sort of sentiment is something you run in to a lot and I can really hear your frustration, especially considering you're in a position where expressing your thoughts and feelings can sometimes be a literal life-saver.
I'm curious to know whether or not, in your experience, these comments exclusively come from guys, girls, or a mixture of both (if so, whether there's a majority)?
In this episode some really interesting statics about suicide are brought up; Of the 5,981 suicides in 2012, an astonishing 4,590 (76%) were men, suicide is the biggest killer of men under 50 in Britain.The director of Calm (the campaign behind the post above) "that while breast cancer does kill men, we rightly focus on it as a female disease. In the same way, suicide prevention has to focus on men." Although are statically the are more women with depression. They are more likely to ask for help, I think phrases with like "man up" and the stereotypes of masculinity lead to a inability to deal with emotion/ask for emotional support.
I would encourage anyone to watch this documentary and would love to here any incites or opinions on this topic or anything else brought up in the show.
We need to work together as a society to change this. This involves changing the perceptions of the male stereotype, and also allowing men to ask for help.
Actually, a man is only likely to be called a misogynist or chauvinist in the situation if he's bringing up the subject as a way of silencing a discussion on another issue.
Again, we need to work together as a society to change this. I certainly give exactly the same emotional support to my male friends as I do to my female ones (and those of non-binary gender).
This is a statistic I hadn't heard before, and one that caused me to do some research. I wonder if it is because generally it's seen as more harmful for women to be out on the street because of the risk of rape and abuse? Perhaps men are seen as more capable of looking after themselves and therefore in less danger? Still, I think it would be useful for us to increase the provision for the homeless.
There is male privilege, it's not made non-existent by the existence of a single area where women "do better" than men. I also don't see its relevance to a discussion about men's feelings?
This is biology. Humans don't have control of biology. Again, I don't see its relevance to this thread about men's feelings?
Yes, feminists would like equal access to all professions for all genders. That includes sewage workers, roadsweepers, mechanics etc. That is why there is a big push for females to study STEM subjects. Do you consider that all muslims agree with the ideology of ISIS? If not, don't tar feminism with the same brush as the few radicals that give causes a bad name. Feminism fights for men's rights as well.
I don't think that many of these comments have anything to do with the issue being discussed in this thread, which is talking about men's feelings.