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Obsessive self harmer looking for my version of normality

Hey I'm Acat I self harm of course, it makes me feel better though the injuries fast forward a few days don't. I'd stopped s/h when I got with my fiancé for ages but then it turned out he'd lied to me about a few things so I ended up reverting to my old coping mechanism s/h. I was going to hide it from him but the gash was so deep we had to go to a+e the funny thing is at the time I had not much of an idea of what I was doing. Like my ex psychologist said if there's something I don't like I just dissociate from it!
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Welcome to the boards! Thanks for posting this thread to introduce yourself, I've moved it to this forum (health and wellbeing) as you'll be more likely to get responses in this forum. Thanks for sharing your story and whats been going on for you. Sounds like things are hard but you're trying hard to cope at the moment. It's really positive that you wrote about it here. Could you say more about what you mean when you say it's like you don't know what you're doing and if there's something you don't like you dissociate from it?
There's some articles here that might be useful to have a look at if you haven't already called 'Having a self harm relapse' and Self-harm and your relationship