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Why do they need to know my every step :/
One-in-a-million
Posts: 606 Incredible Poster
Ok guy just feeling a bit fed up 
Before I start lets give you a couple of details about myself I'm female, 21 years.
I feel whatever my plans are, where ever I wanna go my family need to know. I cant just say I'm going out with a friend because I always get
Where, what for, who with and how long for
Like I mean every time! And if i mention a name they don't recognise its "who are they?"
I feel like a teenager here instead of an adult. I want my own privacy and to do my own thing. If I haven't given a time or have but want to stay out longer I have to ring and let people know.
This has gotten to the point where I have sometimes lied (i hate lying) but same as going on a date which would result in
"Who are they"
"How old"
"Where did you meet them"
"where you going"
"How long for"
"Who else is going"
"be careful"
Ect
So sometimes when I say does it matter? They say "we only want to know where you are, we aren't trying to take your privacy away"
But it feel like they are I have never been out without telling someone who I'm with and where I'm going, what Im doing and for how long. So basically no privacy.
Ive also pointed out that when my cousin goes out (he's 17) alls is said is "will you be back for dinner/tea?"
To which I was told is different because he's a boy
Im just as capable of looking after myself as he is. Recently I've been diagnosed with epilepsy but the seizers I have don't effect my consciousness and only sometimes effect my concentration/ awareness. When this does happen it is only 30 seconds max. I don't have many and can go months and months without having one. So now this is there excuse for needing to know where I am 24/7 but it was like this before anyway.
I feel annoyed because I'm an adult who people are keeping track of
Sorry guys more of a rant to be honest
Before I start lets give you a couple of details about myself I'm female, 21 years.
I feel whatever my plans are, where ever I wanna go my family need to know. I cant just say I'm going out with a friend because I always get
Where, what for, who with and how long for
Like I mean every time! And if i mention a name they don't recognise its "who are they?"
I feel like a teenager here instead of an adult. I want my own privacy and to do my own thing. If I haven't given a time or have but want to stay out longer I have to ring and let people know.
This has gotten to the point where I have sometimes lied (i hate lying) but same as going on a date which would result in
"Who are they"
"How old"
"Where did you meet them"
"where you going"
"How long for"
"Who else is going"
"be careful"
Ect
So sometimes when I say does it matter? They say "we only want to know where you are, we aren't trying to take your privacy away"
But it feel like they are I have never been out without telling someone who I'm with and where I'm going, what Im doing and for how long. So basically no privacy.
Ive also pointed out that when my cousin goes out (he's 17) alls is said is "will you be back for dinner/tea?"
To which I was told is different because he's a boy
Im just as capable of looking after myself as he is. Recently I've been diagnosed with epilepsy but the seizers I have don't effect my consciousness and only sometimes effect my concentration/ awareness. When this does happen it is only 30 seconds max. I don't have many and can go months and months without having one. So now this is there excuse for needing to know where I am 24/7 but it was like this before anyway.
I feel annoyed because I'm an adult who people are keeping track of
Sorry guys more of a rant to be honest
0
Comments
I too get this off my mum. I am also female and 21. Of my mum it's always who 'whats their name' so I make up names now haha! She dosent need to know who I go out with. I too have seizures but like you not very often. I think it's just a normal mum though!
You're always welcome to blow off some steam on here. I reckon many of us on here (particularly girls) can relate here :yes: Parents often find it difficult to accept that their child is growing up and will tend to ask a lot of questions. You might find our article worth a read: Problematic parents.
Can I ask what your overall relationship is like with your parents? From your post it sounds like you feel you can't often be open about where you are going or who with. Are there certain things you feel you can be open about with your parents?
I wonder if you might consider finding an opportunity to talk to them about how you're feeling if it's getting to you :chin:
I believe; its nice to know I'm not the only one and in a good way its nice to have someone in the very same situation as me age, disability (although I don't class it as one for myself) gender and the same parental problem.
Just feels like I cant really do my own thing without people knowing what it is. But yeah its parents being parents I guess except its mum dad and nan lol
Raich; thank you for replying my overall relationship is good. Don't get me wrong we never fight or anything. But I tend to keep myself to myself and don't really talk about what I'm doing or things that have happened in my personal life.
The main reason being the protectiveness of my family over me. Sometimes I feel bad about some of the things I don't share with them. For example I never told them about my sexual harassment and bullying while I was at school (over 5 years ago) but I didn't want to upset them and for them to over react.
I have tried explaining but they think Im not listening when they are saying about my safety and stuff
Thanks once again