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I don't even know anymore
![Former Member](https://us.v-cdn.net/6030621/uploads/defaultavatar/nJHX7Z3NJVPO4.jpg)
So recently me and my ex girlfriend broke up. She broke up with me because I wasn't into all the sex stuff and didn't really want to do it basically.
Problem is, she appears to have a very quick rebound. She has a new guy, I happen to have been friends with him up until the point they started dating. I think she has said something to him about not talking to me because that's how it's been since then. So I basically lost my girlfriend and best friend in one go.
I discovered earlier that I am definitely NOT okay with that. I was fine, casually browsing my facebook feed. When I happened to see a picture of the two together. I completely lost it. (Now here's for the incredibly unmanly part of me...) I just completely broke down crying and it lasted a few hours, hell as I type this I'm only like half normal. I don't know what's wrong with me because I was fine with it up until then which is just weird.
Help?
Problem is, she appears to have a very quick rebound. She has a new guy, I happen to have been friends with him up until the point they started dating. I think she has said something to him about not talking to me because that's how it's been since then. So I basically lost my girlfriend and best friend in one go.
I discovered earlier that I am definitely NOT okay with that. I was fine, casually browsing my facebook feed. When I happened to see a picture of the two together. I completely lost it. (Now here's for the incredibly unmanly part of me...) I just completely broke down crying and it lasted a few hours, hell as I type this I'm only like half normal. I don't know what's wrong with me because I was fine with it up until then which is just weird.
Help?
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Comments
You know, that is so not weird. It's totally understandable.
I feel this is particularly true when it's still raw (like it sounds like it is for you?). It's possible (and not uncommon) to be numb to something for a while until it sinks in, or until something triggers that emotional response in you. Let yourself be with these feelings and cry, be angry, hide under a duvet while devouring Ben & Jerry's, or whatever else you need to do to heal yourself naturally.
Also, all this must feel very isolating (as well as generally quite shit) - remember, even if it feels like people important to you aren't around, we're here. :yes:
Props to you for standing your ground with regards to the sexual stuff, by the way; shows real integrity.
How are you doing, today?
Issue is, I really don't have time to be feeling like this. I have AS exams in just over a week and I really need to revise but I can't while I'm in this state.
I had to go to school today and it was awful. I can't be near either of them otherwise I start getting panicky, especially when they're together. I hate it so much. They are both in one of my classes so I can't concentrate there either.
My parents keep telling me to stop being so dramatic and get over it. They tell me I'm weak for crying, that I'm pathetic. I probably am really.
Best of luck.
I cannot erase them from my life, I attend the same school as them, have mutual friends and have the same classes. We are even in groups for work stuff. So avoiding them isn't the answer at all.
Also, I can't just 'make new friends'. It is already established after 6 years attending this school who is my friend and who hates me. That and social anxiety is horrible and would never allow me to.
It's hard around exam time too and it seems like the anxiety you are having isn't helping. This all seems understandable though, considering you see them all the time and don't seem to be able to get away from them!
How would you feel about speaking to one of them? They may not deserve your time right now and you do mention being extra busy, but it may remove that slight awkwardness and make you feel a bit more at ease if you bump into them (or even make you the bigger person for speaking up and acknowledging this). Just a thought :chin:
Do let us know how you get on *hug*
I just cannot take anything else right now. I haven't even looked at my phone in about 3 days because I'm so done. I can't handle anything right anymore, I completely broke down over simply writing something wrong yesterday.
It's getting really hard, I could really do with some help.
I've moved in with my nan, I know I'm never allowed home again...
Sounds like a hard time at the moment for you. How are things at the moment? You were saying that they hate that you do A levels and how you look and your personality, what makes you say that they hate you? You said that you moved in with your nan, has has that been for you? What makes you say that you know you're never allowed home?
Things with my nan have been alright, we get along a lot better.
I know I'm never allowed home because that's what they said. I'm allowed to visit but not live there. They threw me out...
That sounds really hard to deal with - having them constantly point out all your flaws and not seeing any good in you
That's good to hear that things have been alright with your nan and that you get along better
You were saying you're allowed to visit, have you been able to visit since they threw you out?
We've got article here which might be useful to read called 'Thrown out by your parents'
Let us know how you're doing
I'll have a read. I'm not really doing great at all, I feel like I'm losing myself.
Ah OK, what makes you say that you'll see how bad it gets? Whats making you think that? Let us know how it goes.
Hope you find the article useful, sorry to hear that you aren't doing great, its really good you're speaking about how you're feeling here. What's makes you say that you feel like you're losing yourself, could you say more about how you've been feeling?
We do have this other article called Problematic parents that might be useful to read too.
Hope this helps and let us know how it goes tomorrow too
I just am loosing myself. I'm not happy and energetic like I used to be. I've lost all my confidence. I don't want to ever do anything but lay in bed...
Just wanted to see how it was on Thursday at your sisters birthday? Sorry to hear that you feel like your loosing yourself and that you aren't happy and energetic like before. When did you start feeling this way? Sounds really hard that you've lost all your confidence and don't want to do anything but lay in bed, its really good that you're talking on here about your feelings though. We've got an article here on mindfulness which might be useful to read. There's also this page here about how to get more confidence which could be helpful to read too.
Let us know how you're getting on, we're here for you.
I started feeling like this about a year ago but it's just getting worse and worse and now I just can't handle it. I just lost everything, I have nothing or nobody left.
Not really. It was just gradually getting worse with my parents and then it transferred to my other relationships and my school work and so on. I feel like I have nobody left because I don't. My parents couldn't give a care in the world what happened to me, and my 'friends' have just left me. I don't have friends anymore.
You were saying that your friends have just left you, this sounds really tough. When did your friends leave you? How are you feeling about this.
You're doing really well to talk here, we're all here for you. Just wanted to let you know about an organisation called Relate they have a live chat with a counselor on their website about anything to do with relationships which might be useful to look at.
My friends left me gradually over the past few months. Last one left earlier this week. Makes me feel awful, unwanted.
Thank you for listening to me, it really helps to talk about it all
Really sorry to hear that things are sloping downhill at the moment. It does sound difficult and so overwhelming. How have you felt since the exams finished?
I wonder if you might think about this as an opportunity to take some time out for yourself; to think about what you would ideally like to happen now, and where to go from here? Could you think of some of the positive things in your life at the moment? :chin: Good to hear that things are going well with your boyfriend, have you been able to talk to him about how you're feeling?
As Steph mentioned, Relate have some really great stuff here on getting support with all different kinds of relationships. Do you think its worth a try?
Glad that it's helping for you to post on here