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Running Away.

ShatteredSecretsShatteredSecrets NoobPosts: 186 Boards Initiate
Hi guys..

I'm thinking of running away. I just feel so overwhelmed. There is nobody left to turn to. Uni is a nightmare. I am receiving no support from there and they pretty much refuse to give it. The bullying has started again and nobody seems to care. I've spoken to student services.. my tutor.. student union execs.. nothing. I am beside myself. Beyond help. People would say to me "just move out". But that currently is not an option. Nobody seems to care about me or what I do or whether I'm safe or not. I just have no idea what to do anymore. I don't have much fight left to deal with all of this day in and day out... and no for those who are thinking it, I'm not suicidal or anything... I just can't cope and need to disappear for a while. I just need a break.

In all honesty, I have no idea why I'm even posting here... it just kind of happened.

If you've read this, I thank you.

- ShatteredSecrets

I am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey SS :wave:

    Im so sorry that things are really tough for you. There's a lot going on there and it really sounds like everything is overwhelming you.
    I hope that posting here offered you some relief, even if it was only a little bit? When I read your post I just wanted to give you a big *hug*

    Is there anyone higher up in the student support/welfare team you could think about contacting, if you have not found the advice and support systems you need?
    When things get too much - the natural response is to just run away from it all. It's so natural and I can see how it might seem an attractive thing to do. Is there somewhere you could go - perhaps to a friends for a night or two, to get some breathing space? It may help you decompress and offer you the chance to gather your thoughts. Your friend may be able to offer you some advice on steps you could take next too. :)

    You are very brave for opening up to us on here, and however alone you feel, you have us on here to reach out to :yes:

    Stay strong - and keep posting - we are here for you whenever you need us x


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I runaway from home when I was in college and whilst I was in school, I remember both times exactly, The first time I got on a train and ended up in a random city with no idea where I was or what I could do next, I think I was about 16 at the time and by the night (I runaway straight after school) I was cold, Wet, tired an hungry. I was in the middle of a field and people we’re walking past at me on the floor crying, In the end I made it to some café where I broke down (this was two days later) the woman asked if I was okay and I told her I was missing, she gave me food and a drink and then rang the police, a while later I found out people we’re worried sick of my whereabouts and there was a massive police enquiry and I missed out on taking my GCSE’s because I runaway during them.

    The second time I runaway I told my Camhs counsellor (I was still probably 16) I was feeling suicidal and she said she was going to ring my parents and tell her, and I flipped out, I went to college, stayed for about an hour or two and got more and more anxious as the day went on, Eventually I decided that’s it, I’m running, So I got a train to another random city with the hope of meeting a friend at the other end, except I couldn’t get as far as I’d like to because I didn’t have the money, in the end at about 11pm my friend called the police on me and they tried taking me home, but I refused so they put me in a B&B for the night, because I was under 18 and told me to go home in the morning. In the morning I runaway again from the B&B and my battery life wasn’t very good, I had £2 and Vodafone at the time you could charge your phone for an hour for £2 at their office. So I went in and spent the only money I had. I was so hungry I vomited and the police we’re called to this girl acting odd. They rang my parents and I remember my father crying down the phone saying “We’ve lost her…I’ve lost my angel”

    My point is, Running away hasn’t solved anything, My problems still followed me, every problem I had when I lived with my parents I still had when I runaway. I just made them 10x worse because I put my life at risk, I slept rough on the street in the pitch black in a field. It wasn’t safe. I put my life at risk for what I thought would fix the problems in my head, yes the support and help out their isn’t great, but let me tell you sweat, its so much better than running away.
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