Difficulty in Relaxing

Former Member

Basically, I just feel like I've lost my ability to relax in general. I used to love chilling whilst watching TV, but now I don't have the concentration span anymore. I don't have the desire to relax. Normally I end up wasting my spare time literally doing nothing.

After all that's happened this year, I feel I've lost my ability to relax and enjoyment from it. I know mindfulness is relaxing, but I haven't had the motivation to do the meditation sessions online and I've only done the techniques when stressed etc. My point is I feel I can't enjoy anything anymore, I'm not sure why. I mean things have been tough, and I'm starting to get back on track but I feel I still can't relax.

I know it's important, especially with me starting uni. As of next week I'll barley have any time on my hands. Just like they said at my uni introduction- balance is key to surving uni. It's just as important to have down time as working hard. Hence, I feel the need to be able to relax even more so.

Former Member

Hey apandav, *hug*s

Sorry to hear your struggling with relaxing, could you try having a nice bath or shower and then doing something that doesn't involve a screen so something like colouring or writing, that may help.

Hope your okay, keep posting if you need too

Former Member

Thanks *BananaMonkey* *hug*

I just find it hard to motivate myself to do things including relaxing. Like I feel I've lost myself. It's hard to explain. I just don't know exactly what I like anymore.

Probably should try to cut down my iPad usage etc. I'm just weary of the fact at uni I will need to be able to wind down. For obvious reasons, if I want to survive uni!

Former Member

It sounds to me that you have a great self awareness of what you need.

Finding motivation is sometimes difficult, something that helps me are post it notes to remind me to do things, also remembering how I will feel after I have done things if that makes sense.

Former Member

I'll give it a go. I know that being busy is good for me. I have actually had a very busy weekend, preparing for uni. However, I do find it hard to relax- if I have something I need to do, I have to get it all done before I relax. I can't relax if I was to take a break in between. I'm a bit weary that at uni, I may have some tasks that I will have to complete over a time period. I'm just wondering how will I be able to relax then? In the past I struggled a lot with balance during exam season and found it hard to switch off (my parents had to tell me to stop studying on numerous occasions). I just felt during my free time I couldn't stop thinking about what I needed to do. I would like to be able to enjoy the little free time I get to relax- I want to survive uni after all!

Former Member

Not sure what to say to help but wanted to offer you some *hug*s

Former Member

Thank you *BananaMonkey* *hug* s back

Former Member

It's okay. Anytime

Former Member

Yes, I have heard of progressive muscle relaxation - infact it's on a CD I got from the primary MH team I saw. I all honetsly, I did try it but I kept on getting distracted- couldn't sir through the full duration. Then I gave up on it! I just felt as I relaxed eg. my face, my legs would get restless. I guess I should give it another shot, I didn't practice it enough!

Recently I have been using walks as a get away, when I feel the need. Exercise - I feel bad, as I used to do it regularly but now I feel crap that I've put on weight and I dread exercise as I know I can't do as much as I used to be able to (I know it will be more difficult as it's been a while). Really I should start!

Knowing me, I will get stressed and probably overwhelm myself but I want to prevent that (or at least not get so uptight!!).

Former Member

It can take a while to get into. I remember I got given some breathing techniques in therapy and it took over a month's worth of practice before any of it started to come naturally. I'm not saying at all that the breathing techniques will take that long, however it might take a few sessions before you can get into it!

Anything is an uphill struggle at the start, but give it time and you'll definitely be able to do it

Former Member

Yeah that's true! I'm so impatient !!