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Barriers? Opening up to friends about mental health.

*BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical PosterPosts: 5,426 Part of The Furniture
Yo dudes :wave:

So... about a month ago there was a chat all about reaching out to friends about our mental health.

From this chat we spoke about lots of things, something that I wanted to chat a bit about in this thread is the barriers to opening up to friends about our mental health.

Some things that were said in the chat were:

That your friend(s) may be busy and you wouldn't want to bother them,

What if they act differently towards me.

I had a bad experience in the past and it's making me worried about opening up again.



I know for me personally opening up to friend's has left me with lots of different reactions, one friend basically told me she didn't want anything to do with me, and another really good friend who I have known for years listens to me, but I guess she doesn't really know what to say, but that's okay, sometimes just having somebody to listen to you helps so much.

I have one really close friend who I can honestly tell her anything, and she knows what to say, she understands and she just helps me so much.

So I thought from this thread people could share what their barriers have been with opening up to friends, and if you have found any ways to overcome those barriers.


Sharing is caring :heart:
" And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
" So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
'' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I remember one of my friends finding out (um, I didn't tell him, he found out) and after asking me some questions, I got the impression he didn't understand. His reactions really confused me. He went from "I don't trust you" to "I don't want to talk to you".

    Unfortuantely, I had issues 5 years ago, which in part involved him. He was also having some of his own issues. (I was well aware of this) He again, went from "I don't trust you" to "I don't want to talk to you".
  • apandavapandav :) Posts: 2,072
    I've told two friends about my mental health struggles- both reactions were quite different.

    One of my friends was really supportive. She told me that's she's there if I ever need to talk or just to meet up to take my mind off things.

    The other friends reaction wasn't bad but wasn't really what i expected or was looking for. She basically tried to convince me antidepressants are dangerous and that she thinks I shouldn't be taking them. I wasn't at my best at this point, so much so I actually considered coming off them at the time. Also she said I need to stay busy- she went on to say how she does this through boyfriends. And then started trying to convince me to start dating (to take my mind off things). This was not helpful at all. She was supportive in terms that she said she's glad I told her and she didn't react badly. But I didn't find her advice helpful and it wasn't what I wanted. Also she started saying I should be careful what I tell my other friend (in first paragraph). This actually caused me more anxiety. To be honest I feel that that friend is more supportive than her.

    One of my other friends knows as her twin sister told her (which is friend one). She was also very supportive.
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,426 Part of The Furniture
    Melian wrote: »
    I remember one of my friends finding out (um, I didn't tell him, he found out) and after asking me some questions, I got the impression he didn't understand. His reactions really confused me. He went from "I don't trust you" to "I don't want to talk to you".

    Unfortuantely, I had issues 5 years ago, which in part involved him. He was also having some of his own issues. (I was well aware of this) He again, went from "I don't trust you" to "I don't want to talk to you".


    Sorry to hear that, It's sad to think how lack of understanding can really make us feel when we open up to friends about mental health. Do you have other friends you can talk to? *hug*s

    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,426 Part of The Furniture
    apandav wrote: »
    I've told two friends about my mental health struggles- both reactions were quite different.

    One of my friends was really supportive. She told me that's she's there if I ever need to talk or just to meet up to take my mind off things.

    The other friends reaction wasn't bad but wasn't really what i expected or was looking for. She basically tried to convince me antidepressants are dangerous and that she thinks I shouldn't be taking them. I wasn't at my best at this point, so much so I actually considered coming off them at the time. Also she said I need to stay busy- she went on to say how she does this through boyfriends. And then started trying to convince me to start dating (to take my mind off things). This was not helpful at all. She was supportive in terms that she said she's glad I told her and she didn't react badly. But I didn't find her advice helpful and it wasn't what I wanted. Also she started saying I should be careful what I tell my other friend (in first paragraph). This actually caused me more anxiety. To be honest I feel that that friend is more supportive than her.

    One of my other friends knows as her twin sister told her (which is friend one). She was also very supportive.


    Thanks for sharing apandav :heart:

    I am glad that you have a friend who you can talk to or even just to meet up for a distraction and some company.

    With regards to what your other friend said, it doesn't sound like that was what you needed. It's good that you had a positive reaction though from other friend.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru


    Sorry to hear that, It's sad to think how lack of understanding can really make us feel when we open up to friends about mental health. Do you have other friends you can talk to? *hug*s

    I didn't, no. Unknown to me, his wife has quite severe mental health issues, which may explain his reaction.
  • apandavapandav :) Posts: 2,072
    Yo dudes :wave:

    So... about a month ago there was a chat all about reaching out to friends about our mental health.

    From this chat we spoke about lots of things, something that I wanted to chat a bit about in this thread is the barriers to opening up to friends about our mental health.

    Some things that were said in the chat were:

    That your friend(s) may be busy and you wouldn't want to bother them,

    What if they act differently towards me.

    I had a bad experience in the past and it's making me worried about opening up again.



    I know for me personally opening up to friend's has left me with lots of different reactions, one friend basically told me she didn't want anything to do with me, and another really good friend who I have known for years listens to me, but I guess she doesn't really know what to say, but that's okay, sometimes just having somebody to listen to you helps so much.

    I have one really close friend who I can honestly tell her anything, and she knows what to say, she understands and she just helps me so much.

    So I thought from this thread people could share what their barriers have been with opening up to friends, and if you have found any ways to overcome those barriers.


    Sharing is caring :heart:

    Sorry to hear about one of your friends lack of understanding *hug* but I'm glad that you have two great friends. It's good that your best friend is really understanding, I'm sure that helps a lot!

    Great intro to starting this thread, by the way :)
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,426 Part of The Furniture
    apandav wrote: »

    Sorry to hear about one of your friends lack of understanding *hug* but I'm glad that you have two great friends. It's good that your best friend is really understanding, I'm sure that helps a lot!

    Great intro to starting this thread, by the way :)


    Thanks :heart:
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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