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When do you involve friends in a new relationship? - Poll

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Hi everyone! :wave:

I just wondered what your guys' thoughts were on when you get your friends involved in a new relationship? The following are a couple of options you can choose from:
  1. Right at the start
  2. After a few dates
  3. Not until we're officially a couple
  4. Never - friends and relationships don't mix

Please feel free to add your answers below - there is no right or wrong answer - it's just a good place to find out what your thoughts and feelings are on this :)

Looking forward to seeing your comments :d

x

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tammmmmmmm XD hope ur ok lovely to see u online

    Iam confused :/
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What do you mean 'get them involved'?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It depends on which friends. I think there's only one friend that I'd involve straight away, but then most of my other friends I'd probably tell when we're finally a couple, and then there's a few friends that I just probably wouldn't tell at all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Part of the furniture Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Official, but then again varies on who that individual is and for so.
  • Former MemberFormer Member :) Posts: 2,072 Boards Champion
    Honesty I've never been in a relationship before but I'd say 3 officially a couple or between 2 and 3 (definitely more than a few dates though).

    Just wanted to add I watched this programme tonight "Married at First Sight" (on channel 4) where this couple met were matched by experts and only met for the first time at their wedding. The groom even met the brides parents before the bride herself!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    butterfly123 wrote: »
    It depends on which friends. I think there's only one friend that I'd involve straight away, but then most of my other friends I'd probably tell when we're finally a couple, and then there's a few friends that I just probably wouldn't tell at all.

    Indeed. :) There are a few friends I would tell as things happened and developed just because it's nice to have someone I trust clued in and chatting about it. I'm generally pretty private so there's probably only a couple of people that this would be the case with. Other people would likely just find out when it was in the open and official, anyway. I wouldn't go to the trouble of notifying people; they'd just find out if they found out, wouldn't be bothered if some people didn't.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah I agree - it depends on your friends.

    I was told by the guy I once dated not to tell certain people, which really did ring alarm bells for me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Mod malarkist Deactivated Posts: 9,233 Supreme Poster
    Hiccup wrote: »
    What do you mean 'get them involved'?


    I guess it means let them know about the relationship, perhaps ask their opinion and encourage them to meet your partner.
  • Former MemberFormer Member mod Deactivated Posts: 560 Incredible Poster
    Petrichor wrote: »
    Indeed. :) There are a few friends I would tell as things happened and developed just because it's nice to have someone I trust clued in and chatting about it.
    Melian wrote: »
    I was told by the guy I once dated not to tell certain people, which really did ring alarm bells for me.

    It is nice to have to have at least one friend that you can involve in your relationship. And it does seem to be a negative point if someone wants to stop friends being involved.

    I'm just wondering, what do you think the main reasons for having friends involved in a relationship are? Support for the tough patches? Getting their opinion on your boyfriend/girlfriend? Something else?

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think, as much as the "screw what people think" attitude towards love does have its validity, it is always good to at least have an outsider's opinion available. You can't always see your own relationship for what it is and it's easy to be blinkered. That, and having someone to offload to if the going gets tough is invaluable sometimes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member mod Deactivated Posts: 560 Incredible Poster
    Petrichor wrote: »
    I think, as much as the "screw what people think" attitude towards love does have its validity, it is always good to at least have an outsider's opinion available. You can't always see your own relationship for what it is and it's easy to be blinkered. That, and having someone to offload to if the going gets tough is invaluable sometimes.

    That makes a lot of sense :) It makes me think, it can be all too easy to end up with a romantic idea that boyfriend/girlfriend relationships should be perfect and make our lives better in every way, but actually sometimes we really need other relationships (like friendships) to make our romantic relationships stronger and happier.
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