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How do you break up without "breaking" your partners heart?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Is there really aa way to tell someone you're seeing and care about that you don't want to see them anymore without breaking his/her heart?
I know that it depends on many factors, like how emotional you both are, how long you are together, if you were doing ok in the relationship, if you had fights, and many other things,,,

But on the bottomline is there a way not to hurt ones feelings when breaking up?

What's your oppinion?

P.S. Would you rather tell the truth about why it's not working anymore, or tell the other one something that will make them feel better but is not true, just to make it easier for them?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Be honest. Trying to cushion the blow comes over as not being as convinced and them thinking there could be another chance. Be honest, but not nasty or insulting about it and it will be ok.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi there HoneyBear,

    Unfortunately, if someone really cares about you and you've had a good relationship, it doesn't matter how gently you let them down, it's still going to hurt. As StrubbleS said, it's definitely better to be open and honest with them about why it's not working. If there are some details about why you're ending it that might hurt them and aren't 100% necessary (e.g. you don't like their dress sense) then leave them out.

    Perhaps a way of softening the blow could be telling them that you're ending it because it doesn't feel right for you and you can't see yourself having a future with them but following this up with something positive about them and what you liked about being with them.

    Hope this helps and good luck. Feel free to let us know how it goes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't think there is any way to break up with someone without breaking their heart. In my opinion the best thing to do in that situation is to just be honest. If you begin to feel this way in a relationship, the sooner that those feelings are brought out into the open the better. Maybe the other person was feeling the same way but too afraid to say? It is different in every situation and there is no easy way around it, but sometimes things happen and we have to deal with them.
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