Counseling questions

Former Member

Have any of you been in counseling? I am talking about mental health counseling!

I am in counseling right niw and te other day I was sharing some emotional facts of my past, I tried to do not cry but ended up crying; and the thing is my counselor started crying too!
I felt really bad, I did not mean to make her feel sad. I do not know if I should keep with the counseling or just quit!

Former Member

I don't know enough to comment properly, but a big part of counselling is to turf up things from the past and try to come to terms with them. Getting emotional is an inevitability, so don't feel bad about it. I would also imagine that counselors get emotional themselves from time to time, but it is part of their job so you've got nothing to feel guilty about. You certainly shouldn't quit on these grounds!

Good luck *hug*

Former Member

Hi Sky15, welcome to TheSite boards

I think it's really good that you cried in counselling - it means that you're managing to get to things that have a lot of feeling for you. Petrichor is right, counsellors do sometimes get emotional too. Do remember that counsellors have chosen to do a job where they speak to people about difficult and often sad things. As a counsellor, she will have had training, and she will have plenty of support in place to help her deal with her feelings. For example, she will have a supervisor who she will see regularly to talk through what's going on for her.

It might also be worth thinking about whether crying is necessarily a bad thing. Getting your feelings out is really important, and we all have some difficult feelings inside us. And feeling emotional doesn't always mean feeling bad, it might just mean that your counsellor is comfortable with expressing the emotions that she's feeling at the time.

Counselling isn't always easy, but it can make a real difference, so it's really great that you've started on that journey. Do keep coming back and asking for support, or to ask any other questions.

Former Member

Sky15 wrote: »

Have any of you been in counseling? I am talking about mental health counseling!

I am in counseling right niw and te other day I was sharing some emotional facts of my past, I tried to do not cry but ended up crying; and the thing is my counselor started crying too!
I felt really bad, I did not mean to make her feel sad. I do not know if I should keep with the counseling or just quit!

Hello Sky,

Warm welcomes to TheSite.org message boards :wave: - It's great to see you reaching out to support around you. It sounds as though the counselling session was quite challenging, and often the 'challenging aspect' of it can put us off. As we don't always want to accept what's happened in the past. But can often be the curve to getting better.

However, I know that having a therapist cry during a consultation can be difficult, but often tends to be a one off, counselling can be really beneficial, but can take an awful lot of time to actually become helpful and fit the needs suited to you. This might include changing therapists a few times, trying a variety of therapies, etc. But again, it's something you can talk to your therapist about.

If you did however feel uncomfortable talking to the therapist you've been given, please don't quit, and speak up about it, change can be made to best suit you, but therapy will only work if you want it to work. Do keep us updated on how things are going for you. When is your next session? - Do you have other people involved in your case who you can talk to for the time being, for example a social worker, or key worker?

Best wishes,
WhisersOfTheHeart

Former Member

Hi there,

I have been to counselling before for my problems that I was having and I found that the first session was the hardest.

I wasn't use talking about my feelings to anyone who I didn't know as I thought I would get judged and wouldn't understand.

Only, when I went a few times I started to feel more confident in going there the more I spoke to the same person.

The counselling for me did help in terms of getting my feelings out. I'm not sure it will work for you but it's best to try and see.

x

Former Member

Counselling can be thought of as a journey together with your counsellor - both of you will experience feelings linked to what is talked about and she will be there to help you understand these feelings and how to process them. Like others have said, counsellors have supervision so don't worry. It's horrible the first time you make a therapist cry because of what you say, but when you are talking about such things, that is where the good is done (if that makes sense). It might be worth talking about how opening up made you feel, and how her reaction made you feel too?

Former Member

Don't give up, it's a good sign that your councillor got emotional, it shows that even though they must hear upsetting thing each day, they still care and want to help, so if you feel up to it, go back and as plugitin said, you can tell the councillor how you felt when she got upset, but try really hard to stick with it. Building trust with a councillor is important and at least now you know she really listened and understood your situation, she didn't just switch off and not pay attention, that's got to be a good sign right? But if you genuinely feel that this particular councillor can't help you do please try another.

Talking about your deepest darkest fears & memories or big mistakes you've made are so incredibly hard to do, the more you can begin to trust them the easier it gets. I don't trust easily so I know I looked for excuses to bin off some therapists, don't be as self-destructive ad I was. Get the help you deserve.

Stay strong & take it one step at a time xx

Former Member

Hey Sky - just wanted to check in and see how things are going? How are you feeling about the counselling now?