Home Sex & Relationships
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

what to do as i am paranoid

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
me and my girlfriend has been together for nearly 3 years we both don't live together yet but she stays at mine on a weekend with the kids recently she went away to her mums for few days before she went everyuthing was great between us but since she been back she seems distant with me but I have been very paranoid for long time tho but recently more since she been back here the way she looks at me I just feel like they something wrong but every time I ask her she says she fine nothing wrong but I don't belive her tho I just can tell I got it into my head either wants to split up with me or she getting bored with me and I think she only with me now coz we are going on holiday end of march that's why I think she till here I can be so wrong but that's how I feel.
I have even thought about going to see my doctor to see if I am been really paranoid and see what they can do if anything but I feel so much worser than this tho

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Dave,

    Great you've come to the boards for some advice on your worries/paranoia in your relationship. I've noticed you say her behaviour has changed towards you since she went away to her mothers. Have you asked her specifically about how that stay was? If not I think it would be a good idea to find out the events that may have happened at her mum's house. This may not necessarily have something to do with you, it could be a family issue she's not opened up about yet. You could help her with this process by just asking questions on how it went with her mum and go from there.

    Then of course, there could actually be nothing wrong or nothing she feels is too important to bring up. Some relationships aren't as consistent as others and this is normal, people go through ups and downs with their partners all the time and it can make you paranoid. Here's an article on anxiety in relationships and common problems you can face in relationships .

    I hope I've been helpful! Thanks for contacting the boards :-)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    AdriJ wrote: »
    Some relationships aren't as consistent as others and this is normal, people go through ups and downs with their partners all the time

    :yes:

    It must be really hard for you to have this constant feeling of worry that something is wrong, especially as you say you've been feeling like this for a while *hug*

    One of the most important factors in relationships is communication, and even though you say you have asked her what's wrong, perhaps it's worth arranging a night just the two of you, maybe out of the house to get away from everything, so you are able to talk in a relaxed environment?
    Perhaps the holiday coming up will be just what you both need to relax and open up and reconnect to each other again?

    Being honest with her about your feelings and worries could make her understand better how her recent "distant" behaviour is making you feel.

    Good luck, do let us know how you get on *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Dave,

    It sounds like you are giving yourself a really hard time and worrying an awful lot. You have sensed a change in your girlfriend and fear the worst that she is going to split up with you or she is getting bored with you, and imagining this must feel absolutely devastating for you.
    However this is the worst case scenario, and it might be worth having a calm conversation with your girlfriend, try giving her examples of when you feel she is being different or distant, something may have happened over the weekend, perhaps she is worried about something but this might not be related to you or the relationship between you both. However do try and deal with it sensitively as you don't want her to feel you don't trust her, it's really about helping her to understand how you are feeling at this time. Communication is key.

    You mention about going to see you GP - Consider that some level of worry is normal in relationships, lots of people have insecurities and experience low self-esteem, but when these feeling interfere with our day to day functioning it can be useful to talk to the doctor about things - they will be able to advise you any healthcare which might be appropriate.

    Good Luck and take care.
Sign In or Register to comment.