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Want it? You can't have it!!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok, this is a pretty long story, so i'll try not to bore you all too much, many of my friends know about this and will probley see this and rip the shit out of me, heh. Well, a close friend of mine, she used to have a crush on me, not sure for how long, but anyway, I didn't really want to know, I didn't feel right, so we started speaking and seeing eachother more, there was something there for a while, but.. I didn't see her enough. So, time went on, for some reason we didn't talk much, but during this time, I thought about her a hell of alot, my all emotions towards her grew so powerful.
So, I find out she met this guy in a pub (19). She has been with him a good few months, I can't get her out of my mind. I hate the thought of her being with someone else, I even hated him for a few moments, I don't know him and niether have I met him. I don't want to, i'm afraid it will hurt me too much, seeing them together. So, I think I might have made a bad move by all this, I told her everything I could explain in words, everything, all the feelings I felt, what I thought of her, everything. She has invaded my mind, my sleep, my life. At first, I didn't know what the hell I wanted in life, then it hit me, all I wanted was her. I have discussed this with some of my friends, they say, theres nothing you can do! Forget her! But my heart, it tells me to keep going, I can't give up. Maybe i'm addicted?
After explaining much of my feelings for her (many could not be expressed by mere words.) She didn't know what to say (can you blame her) she is totally speechless about it, so she tells me, she thinks she loves this guy. Of course, that hit me hard. But, its there still. This totally sucks, and I hate it, every minute, knowing she's with him. Whats wrong with me, I can't take it that I missed my chance, and i'll never ever get another chance because I blew it the first time. Everytime I think about it, all the emotion comes rushing back.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
So, I find out she met this guy in a pub (19). She has been with him a good few months, I can't get her out of my mind. I hate the thought of her being with someone else, I even hated him for a few moments, I don't know him and niether have I met him. I don't want to, i'm afraid it will hurt me too much, seeing them together. So, I think I might have made a bad move by all this, I told her everything I could explain in words, everything, all the feelings I felt, what I thought of her, everything. She has invaded my mind, my sleep, my life. At first, I didn't know what the hell I wanted in life, then it hit me, all I wanted was her. I have discussed this with some of my friends, they say, theres nothing you can do! Forget her! But my heart, it tells me to keep going, I can't give up. Maybe i'm addicted?
After explaining much of my feelings for her (many could not be expressed by mere words.) She didn't know what to say (can you blame her) she is totally speechless about it, so she tells me, she thinks she loves this guy. Of course, that hit me hard. But, its there still. This totally sucks, and I hate it, every minute, knowing she's with him. Whats wrong with me, I can't take it that I missed my chance, and i'll never ever get another chance because I blew it the first time. Everytime I think about it, all the emotion comes rushing back.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
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Comments
Just think how unfair it would be if you were in that other doods shoes. Or just think how hard it is for her now shes met someone only for someone she used to like to tell her hes feelings. Its prolly better for you to try and get her out of your mind and concentrate on somone new, otherwise this shit will just torment you.
But, you didn't blow it. You told her how you felt. It was a surprise for her, but at least she knows. Now you've just got to back off, let her make her mind up. Maybe she does love the new bloke, maybe what you said will play on her mind and make her doubt it and think of you. Maybe you have rekindled something. Only time will tell.
At least you had the courage to let her know how you feel about her, which is the best thing you could've done, and the best shot you could give it for anything to happen between you. Well, that's my opinion anyway.
The thing now is to leave it, as if you keep pestering her you may put her right off. Leave it a while - yes, you may miss out, but remember you don't want to be seen as some sort of obsessive nut. Stay friendly with her, and talk to her as you would any friend.
Now for a cliche.... Time to move on. Don't obsess about her, there are others out there, but you've got to be open minded and receptive - which you won't be if you're thinking about her all the time. But I won't say forget about her, as I know from experience that that's too damn hard. But in time the feelings (the bad feelings about missing out, etc) do begin to fade. You've done your best, and the best thing you could. Now try to put it behind you (yes, I know it's hard, but you've got to).
She may be a one in a million girl, your perfect girl, but there are others out there who are just as perfect. One day you will meet another. They do come up every now and again, though it may be years between meeting them.
Now you both need a bit of time. Her to absorb what you've said, and you to get over her as best you can.
Good luck with the future.
Mr_Wobble
At least you got to tell her- you'll feel better for doing so.
Bide youyr time and see what happens- but try do something to take your mind of her.
First sign of getting over her is acceptance if you get that far!
There are other fish in the see and all that- but it will be a while before you see any of that.
Time is a great healer- he just takes so long in coming!
I tend to fall head over heals for some girls pretty quickly... But when someone grows on you, its a whole different story. I hope the next girl I develop these feelings for is capeable of returning them.