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What next?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
I'm a 20 year old student and have never had a girlfriend. There's been girls I've liked but they've always had a boyfriend, or I've been too shy to do anything about it.

At the beginning of December I met a girl at a society I go to, we chatted a bit, and I felt quite attracted to her. We only saw each other once after that before Christmas, and only chatted a little.

The next time I heard about her was a week ago, when I found out she was ill, so I texted her to see if she was ok. She replied, but said that she wasn't sure who I was.

This weekend we've again been at the society and chatted a bit, and I still like her, but I often feel really shy around her and don't have a clue what to say, so just stay quite.

Ideally, I'd like to find out if she has a bf, and then maybe ask her out, but I've not idea how to go about this, or whether I've known her long enough, or even what she thinks. I've had zero experience in any of this ever. Also, I don't want things to be difficult between us if she doesn't want to go out with me for whatever reason.

What can I do?

:confused:

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just keep chatting to her, without any ulterior motives at first. you've already got something in common - the society you both go to - build on that, and if it's meant to be, you'll feel it.

    good luck, keep us updated :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by KoolCat
    if it's meant to be, you'll feel it.

    I don't understand :confused:

    Thanks for the v quick reply tho!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think you should text her and say something like..

    I'm bored, and there's nowt on telly but Corrie..fancy a drink at the pub? Get a weel swally, and perk up your confidence and loosen your tongue and get to know her properly, she'll soon swing your way :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Matthew82


    I don't understand :confused:

    Thanks for the v quick reply tho!

    sorry i meant, if she likes you and you like her, you'll feel the vibes and it will be more easy to talk to her, ask her out for a drink etc.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just treat her first and foremost as a friend. Don't think anything more into it. You have to show her you're a nice person and you don't do that by shoving your tongue down her throat at the first opportunity or trying to take advantage when she's drunk.

    Be a mate, get to know her better then you will have a better idea of if you are right for each other. Chances are she'll realise you feel for her by how you act, you don't need to make it blatantly obvious.

    Anyway you have her number so you can't be doing too bad!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Mindcircus
    Just treat her first and foremost as a friend. Don't think anything more into it. You have to show her you're a nice person and you don't do that by shoving your tongue down her throat at the first opportunity or trying to take advantage when she's drunk.

    Be a mate, get to know her better then you will have a better idea of if you are right for each other. Chances are she'll realise you feel for her by how you act, you don't need to make it blatantly obvious.

    Anyway you have her number so you can't be doing too bad!

    that's exactly what i was trying to say, but mindcircus said it much better :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How about suggesting that a group of your friends and her friends go out clubbing together one night or all go bowling together or whatever. She can either agree or disagree. Then perhaps invite her out to see something on at the cinema without your friends. Again she can either disagree or agree and whatever happens you will find out whether both you and her want to get together.

    Hope what I've written is understandable to you I think it makes sense myself but here am I babbling on again:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm not sure about the cinema option. Everyone has their own way but i try to establish a good friendship first. Ultimately that always leads to you getting hurt twice as much though cos when it ends you lose a g/f and a mate.

    If you're going to ask her out, do something that will definately steal her heart. Take her on the North End!!!:D

    No, seriously, you have a common ground of interest cos of this social club you're in so the conversation should flow easily. Just take it slow, but take it!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by KoolCat


    that's exactly what i was trying to say, but mindcircus said it much better :)

    Great minds think alike eh KoolCat?:p
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