If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Arrrrrrrrrrgh!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm very pissed off at the moment.
Just had a row with my boyfriend over children and I'm not sure what to do.
Basically, as you may know I have a four year old son. Boyfriend gets on with him fine. My son has his dad and sees him on a regular basis so it's all sorted. Anyway, was chatting with him on the phone not long ago and I just happened to mention that my son had said last night that he didn't think he liked him. I told him and was like 'Oh course I do' etc..
He then said that him and kids don't really mix and he doesn't want them, although on a previous occassion when out to dinner he said he did! I told him he was contradicting himself and he either did or he didn't and he said that he didn't think he did.
I said I'm not ready for more children anyway at the moment as my career has just taken off, but I'm pissed off at him saying this. To be honest we've had unprotected sex a few times recently - stupid I know, but I said as he was about to come 'Pull out' and he's like 'Oh baby you don't mind having my babies do you'. Cheeky bastard!
I'm now really confused and don't know how to handle this situation. What do you think?
Just had a row with my boyfriend over children and I'm not sure what to do.
Basically, as you may know I have a four year old son. Boyfriend gets on with him fine. My son has his dad and sees him on a regular basis so it's all sorted. Anyway, was chatting with him on the phone not long ago and I just happened to mention that my son had said last night that he didn't think he liked him. I told him and was like 'Oh course I do' etc..
He then said that him and kids don't really mix and he doesn't want them, although on a previous occassion when out to dinner he said he did! I told him he was contradicting himself and he either did or he didn't and he said that he didn't think he did.
I said I'm not ready for more children anyway at the moment as my career has just taken off, but I'm pissed off at him saying this. To be honest we've had unprotected sex a few times recently - stupid I know, but I said as he was about to come 'Pull out' and he's like 'Oh baby you don't mind having my babies do you'. Cheeky bastard!
I'm now really confused and don't know how to handle this situation. What do you think?
0
Comments
I would say just don't mention it again. If he says he doesn't want kids take that as his final word on the matter and leave it at that. You'll find that if it does happen he'll become a jibbering soppy pile of mush and get all romantic about being a dad. But in the cold light of day, and when it's not actually a reality he has to deal with he's gonna put on this 'don't trap me' front if you try to get an answer out of him.
Actually. I know nothing. Ignore my cynical man-hating.
my boyfriend said the exact same thing to me about not wanting kids. and when i said i totally agree i dont want them either. he looked hurt and said i wasnt being serious i'd love us to have a baby some day. so basicaly what i'm saying is Sassperilla probably right its just the though of being tied down but he will probably warm to the idea of becoming a proper family and maybe even add to it!!
hope that helps!!
I would want the house and a stable relationship first then i would think about...
Talking familys scares the be-jesuse out of most people it is a big step:crazyeyes
There my views anyway:)
He did want kids and told you.
He changed his mind since and told you.
The Cumming inside you comment was just a plan you fell for so he could notch up some "League Points" with the lads.
Nope my last comment was in jest.
I wouldn't look too much into it. We all contradict ourselves at some point or another, it has no bearing on his feelings towards you IMO.
Now if this were me, I'd've pushed him off me at this point & would have to try very hard to restrsin myself from beating the living shit out of him! I mean, wtf?
Girl, I thought you had more respect for yourself then to put up with shit like this.
I told him to forget what we had said about kids etc..I said it was stupid we were even having that conversation and just that my main concern was my son and hoped he wasn't a problem for him. (Thinking he'd say of cousre he's not blah blah) and he says that he is! He says it's something he has to deal with (although he's never mentioned it before) and he's not his dad! I said I never said he was and he has his dad and asked him what he was trying to say. He then told me he didn't want to talk about it, was busy at work and hung up!
*Is fuming*
If he'd have been around I would. As for having respect for myself - of course I do! I'm only human and got caught in the emotion of the sex - yes I know very fucking stupid. I know he cares for me, I'm not naive. No more sex.
if he doesn't want kids any time soon then why is he having unprotected sex...and does this mean he will run off at the first sign of a baby leaving you to cope on your own?
Ok so last night I had everything out with him and he said he was just annoyed at the time and didn't mean anything by it. He said he really likes my son and wouldn't rule out children in the future!
We talked for 4 hours whilst smoking lots of weed
This morning he didn't want to leave and sent me numerous text messages explaining he wanted me so much and that I'm a very special Princess!! (ahhh)
It's all good.
aww thats brilliant mistress i'm really glad things have worked out for you!!!
It's surprising how men (evolution-wise) manged to survive for so long and still not killing themself (the society) (I'm a guy, so you're hearing it from a guys point of view).
I mean, when was the last time you hear women kidnapping children? when was the last time you hear women organising child porn on the internet? and yet, biology isn't so kind on women, there's always this cancer or that cancer....
Going back to your issue, he's just selfish, a liar...
About the 3 x "I love you", all guys do that...I mean, come on, by saying that he's more likely to score. It's like "I love you" is the ultra password that gets you almost straight to sex, getting pass all security. But on the positive side, maybe he really loves you. Take your pick. (but really, a "I love you" right after an arguement usually isn't true, it's just there to make you less angry)
He's NOT a liar either..
Anyway glad you didn’t stay in girl mode to long (that’s how relationship fuck up;) )
You remember every little thing he says and the 6 months down the line throw it at him in a fight! And you read far to much into what we say!
WTF is up with that,
Its not like we listen to what you say;)!, Anyhow glad your happy for now. Don’t get to work up over things he says in the future!
HAHAHAHAHAA
No Offense
Chatbox
Utter bollocks....
No offence