I did a very bad thing.......

Former Member · September 2002

Me and my bf hav been together for over 2 yrs and he is the world to me, I love him more then anything and I dont think I could be without him.

I hav just started in uni, and as it is freshers week I went out one night and got absoloutely hammered - I hav no memory of anything that happened as I was so drunk but I was told by my mates the next day that I snogged a few boys. I am totally gutted that I would do such a thing and dont know how I got in that state but my real problem now is that I cant tell him! We always said if either of us cheated then that was it, no excuses, it would b the end, so I cant tell him because I really dont think its worth losing him over.

I hate lying to him but I dont think one moment of complete stupidity on my part is worth throwing away wot we have together. Its not like I made a conscious decision to cheat and have never ever even been tempted before, I was just so drunk I was incapable of making any decisions, let alone the right one. My friends say I should just forget about it and its not worth telling him because we are such a brilliant couple it would b such a shame to throw it all away.

Part of me thinks I should keep quiet and maybe tell him in a few yrs, when I have grown up a bit and we are more settled (as we are planning on getting married etc in a good few yrs) but the other part cant bare keeping this a secret. What do you guys think?

I have never done anything like this b4 and KNOW I will never let myself get in that situation again, but I'm not sure wot is the right thing to do!

Thanks for any advice!

Former Member · September 2002

From what u have said I think u have suffered with the guilt enough without losing someone u love dearly on top of it. I don't think there is any need to tell him personally. Yeah it was a bad thing but u were very drunk & obviously regret it a lot which means u wouldn't do it again.

I agree with your friends. I don't think it is worth the upset on either of your parts for u to tell him.

Good luck whatever u decide though!

Former Member · September 2002

THANKS! I just need sum un-biased advice as I thought maybe my friends will automatically tell me not to tell him because they dont want to see me upset!

U r right, I am feeling reaaaally

in myself and suffering big time with the guilt and it definately wouldn't achieve anything positive, just cause more heartache over sumthin so insignifcant!

More advice tho please peeps!!

Former Member · September 2002

Really, I wouldn't even think about telling him. From what I can tell you're in a wonderful, happy and loving relationship with him, and there's no need to spoil or that just for the sake of revealing a few moments of stupidity on your part.

The fact you are certain you will never do anything of the sort again just makes me even more certain the he shouldn't be told. There's no point, no need, and it would achieve nothing.

Of course, I wouldn't deny it if he finds out some other way, but please, just don't tell him unnecessarily, you could needlessly spoil a beautiful relationship.

But then it's not up to me, so do whatever you think is best. Just make sure it's the right decision.

Former Member · September 2002

Snogging is hardly cheating in the real sense of the word.

Don't tell him. Get over it. Just remember this feeling, the next time you get blasted...

Former Member · September 2002

I would say dont tell him and try and forget it, it's really not worth risking what you have with your boyfriend over a snog, it would be different if you had slept with someone else but you haven't so stop worrying! (oh and don't do it again!)

I did a very bad thing.......

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