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mothers day. 😢🕊️

eylaheylah Community Connector Posts: 10,645 An Original Mixlorian
in Health & Wellbeing

i miss my mum so much. especially bc on a day like this where ppl my friends are posting abt their mums etc. saying how much their mums have done for them n im not able to post a positive post abt my mum bc she isnt here.

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i feel like since shes passed away ive done nothing but let her down. i havent achieved anything. i feel like i havent made her proud. it rly hurts that im spending today alone bc i tried forgetting that its mothers day but i just cant shift it out my brain.

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i wish my mum was still here bc she was my everything. she suffered so much in her life. and i wish i could of done more to help her with her addiction. i just hope she is okay up there and somewhat proud of me bc i feel like ive failed as a daughter even though she isnt here anymore.

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i have so much emotions in my head rn. its so overwhelming. i feel so alone and i just hate myself. i still blame myself etc. it just never gets easier for me. it is so much to handle on my own. :(

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i miss you mum.happy mothers day mum. i love you so much. 😭🕊️

ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
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Comments

  • ChloeChloe Posts: 8 Confirmed not a robot
    edited March 15

    Sending you all my love right now eylah 🤍🕊 I understand the feeling so soo much and it isnt easy at all! Try to look after yourself today, is there anything that your mum used to do or you used to enjoy doing with her that you could maybe do today to remember although shes not there in person, shes always with you in your heart? 🤍 Sending gentle hugs!

  • VerityVerity Community Manager Posts: 384 Listening Ear

    This is so powerful @eylah it's so nice that you have something physical to remember your mum by. Just making this post shows how much you care and how she is still in your thoughts, just remebering is enough. We're all here for you to day to listen and support.

  • eylaheylah Community Connector Posts: 10,645 An Original Mixlorian

    trying to force myself to go get something for dinner but its proving rly difficult. its difficult living alone bc i have noone to talk to abt how shitty today is making me feel. it isnt easy. and noone around me understands how im feeling or how hard it is. just telling me to get on ‘with’ it. like it ain’t as easy as that 😢.

    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • CallumCallum Community Manager Posts: 343 The Mix Regular

    @eylah It's normal to feel this way on Mother's Day when you're grieving your Mum, you are so strong for being so open about this with us. Did you manage to get something for dinner yesterday? How are you feeling today I wonder? You're not alone in this.

  • eylaheylah Community Connector Posts: 10,645 An Original Mixlorian
    edited March 16

    hi @Callum . i hope you’re well.
    i thought i was feeling better but everything has just plummeted downwards. i just feel sad n alone. i feel like im failing at everything in my life. but i managed to get something for food yes. got same tonight to. meatballs n pasta n garlic bread.

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    just rly wish things were different in my life n that i was happy. i miss old me. the me who was happy. im just sad alone n a mess.
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    but thankyou for replying to me.

    going to go make dinner in a little bit then chill if my overthinking mind lets me. then sleep.

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    hopefully tmr is a new day. n hopefully tmr i feel better 😊.

    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • CallumCallum Community Manager Posts: 343 The Mix Regular

    @eylah It's good to hear that you managed to get some food the other night and last night too, meatballs, pasta and garlic bread sounds delicious!

    I can hear how much you're struggling with feeling down, grieving and like you're failing at everything. You are doing a brilliant job sharing this with us so you're not alone in these thoughts. How are you feeling today I wonder? We're here for you.

  • eylaheylah Community Connector Posts: 10,645 An Original Mixlorian

    hey again @Callum . thankyou so much for replying back to me n making me feel cared for n supported.
    i feel better today. just doing some colouring bc it’s a nice way to distract my brain. but im feeling better thankyou. 💚

    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 6,866 Master Poster
    edited March 17

    Im glad you're feeling better and you've found a distraction, we are all so proud of you. You're so amazing and brave

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