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Not sure on doing a Christmas tradition this year.

AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 582 Incredible Poster
in Health & Wellbeing
I am having a debate with myself at the moment.
Some of you may already know, but I am Christian and normally on Christmas I would go to church, I went with my fiancé but obviously I won't be able to anymore.
I am unsure on what to do this year as I now have my son, it will be his first ever Christmas not in hospital but also his first ever Christmas with a parent and I don't want to have to take a toddler to church, I would but I am unsure of the way he will be about it but also with his weak immune system.

Comments

  • VerityVerity Community Manager Posts: 68 Boards Initiate
    Hey @Animalloverb I understand this time of the year is extra hard for you, I just want to remind you that we are here to listen and support you in the ways we can. It sounds like christmasy eve in with films could be nice? let us know how the evening goes for you and if you go to church, we are here to listen.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 582 Incredible Poster
    @Verity
    I normally go to church on Christmas eve and Christmas day. I decided to nit attend the church service today and I am still debating about the one tomorrow.

    Today has been going alright, my son has been watching films and I have been preparing things for tomorrow.
  • VerityVerity Community Manager Posts: 68 Boards Initiate
    @Animalloverb that sounds like a really lovely and cosy night in, very much in the festive spirit. How are you feeling about tomorrow do you think you will miss not going or prefer not to?
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 582 Incredible Poster
    @Verity
    I don't feel in the spirit though. I am trying to show up for my kid, this time of year is so overwhelming and there are a few people this year that have passed which is making things more difficult, but I am trying to be strong for my kid.
    I am feeling alright about tomorrow, we will just take the day slowly, as it also depends on how my son is. I may miss church this year and try again next year.
  • VerityVerity Community Manager Posts: 68 Boards Initiate
    @Animalloverb I completely understand, the pressure of making it a special time and a reminder of grief must be so difficult, I'm sorry that you've been through this. Just know that it is okay to to not feel strong all the time, you are only human.

    Taking tomorrow slowly sounds like a great idea, whatever desision you make I hope you have a momement tomorrow to feel at ease and relax from the pressures you are going through, and if you don't feel good tomorrow, just take the day as it comes, we are here to listen.
  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 3,214 Boards Guru
    edited 2:25PM
    @Animalloverb , how are you doing?

    I know you mentioned in Chat that you haven't gone to Church today in the end and have decided to stay home for your son. How's that feeling? It sounds like that might have been a tricky decision, and you're doing so well to share.

    I wonder if there might be another way today to honour and bring in your faith if you're wanting to feel connected in that way, whether in a quiet way at home, lighting a candle in the window, or listening to worship music perhaps. We're thinking of you, and it sounds like a lot of change to navigate this year, especially as you used to go to services with your fiancé. Those sound like some really special memories. I really hear your care for your son too, and just how considerate you're wanting to be of all his needs and balance this too. It sounds like lots to hold.

    Wishing you moments of peace today in amongst the busyness. We'll be here for you in Support Chat if it feels helpful to talk.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 582 Incredible Poster
    @Sian321
    It was a hard decision not to go to church but I needed to put my child first.

    I am having a really hard time right now.
  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 3,214 Boards Guru
    I hear you @Animalloverb . That sounds so hard. It seems like you're coping with some really, really difficult things right now, and everything you're feeling is valid. I wonder what you feel you're needing most this evening? Whether that's a space to let your feelings be felt? Comfort perhaps? A positive distraction?

    Shout are here for you alongside Samaritans this evening if you do feel you'd like to talk things through, and to not have to carry this alone.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 582 Incredible Poster
    I don't know what I need. It's just hard. My don has also taken a turn which is awful and I am also really having a hard time with memories from the people I have lost.
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