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SimsSims Posts: 19 Settling in
edited August 27 in Sex & Relationships
What am I sposed to do when my friend is going on a date with an adult man she's a minor this is wrong
Post edited by Katie on
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  • eylaheylah Posts: 9,078 Supreme Poster
    Sims wrote: »
    What am I sposed to do when my friend is going on a date with an adult man she's a minor this is wrong

    is there a trusted adult who you can report this to immediately bc this is not ok. do you know any of her family? who you can report this to.

    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 1,311 Wise Owl
    Hey @Sims

    It sounds like you might be feeling concerned for your friend who is a minor and may be going on a date with an adult man. It's very caring and considerate of you to want to help them and for recognising that this is worrying.

    Like @eylah said, is there a trusted adult you can report this to? And how would you feel about speaking to your friend about why this is concerning?

    I'm also wondering if you know if the adult man is in a position of trust? This means someone who has a role or is in a setting where they have regular and direct contact with vulnerable and/or minors such as teachers, care workers, or doctors.

    Whilst we cannot support your friend directly, I've popped some signposts down below which may be helpful:
    CEOPC (Child Exploitation and Online Protection Command) is a law enforcement agency and is here to keep children and young people safe from sexual exploitation and abuse. You can make a report to one of CEOP's Child Protection Advisors on their website https://www.ceop.police.uk/safety-centre/. If you are reporting sexual abuse or grooming, a Child Protection Advisor will contact you by phone or email as soon as they can and will work with you to make a plan to keep you safe. Find out more information on their website.

    ChildLine offers information, advice and confidential counselling to anyone aged 19 and under on any issue affecting them. Their phoneline is open all day every day by calling on 0800 1111, or you can go to www.childline.org.uk to access their webchat service. They also have a message board for young people on their website .You can also email Childline by signing up for an account and can have 1-on-1 chats with a counsellor when signed into your account.

    Stop it Now is an organisation that gives advice and information for anyone concerned with their own, or another person's thoughts or behaviour towards children. Their helpline number is 0808 1000 900 and they are open Monday-Thursday 9am-9pm and Friday 9am-5pm. If you are in Ireland an alternative helpline number can be found on their website. They also have a live chat that is open various times between 9am and 9pm Monday-Friday. Check the website for specific times. Head to their website www.stopitnow.org.uk to access their live chat, which is open Mondays 9am-12pm, Wednesdays 6pm-9pm and Fridays 9am-2pm.

    Shore is a safe space for teenagers worried about their own or someone else's sexual thoughts, feelings or behaviours, and all of their services are 100% anonymous. They can offer advice and support to help you or someone you know manage worrying thoughts and learn more about living safely both online and offline. Their website offers upfront and clear information on sex and the law. They also have a topic library full of “What to do if…” advice pages. They have a livechat open Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays 5pm-8pm. They also have an anonymous email service where they can answer any questions you may feel uncomfortable asking anyone else. Your email address will be encrypted so they will never see it but you will get the reply sent straight to your inbox. For more information on their services go to https://shorespace.org.uk/
  • SimsSims Posts: 19 Settling in
    eylah wrote: »
    Sims wrote: »
    What am I sposed to do when my friend is going on a date with an adult man she's a minor this is wrong

    is there a trusted adult who you can report this to immediately bc this is not ok. do you know any of her family? who you can report this to.

    I don't know her family and also it wouldn't matter her parents dont care and encourage it and for a trusted adult I dont know any
  • SimsSims Posts: 19 Settling in
    Katie wrote: »
    Hey @Sims

    It sounds like you might be feeling concerned for your friend who is a minor and may be going on a date with an adult man. It's very caring and considerate of you to want to help them and for recognising that this is worrying.

    Like @eylah said, is there a trusted adult you can report this to? And how would you feel about speaking to your friend about why this is concerning?

    I'm also wondering if you know if the adult man is in a position of trust? This means someone who has a role or is in a setting where they have regular and direct contact with vulnerable and/or minors such as teachers, care workers, or doctors.

    Whilst we cannot support your friend directly, I've popped some signposts down below which may be helpful:
    CEOPC (Child Exploitation and Online Protection Command) is a law enforcement agency and is here to keep children and young people safe from sexual exploitation and abuse. You can make a report to one of CEOP's Child Protection Advisors on their website https://www.ceop.police.uk/safety-centre/. If you are reporting sexual abuse or grooming, a Child Protection Advisor will contact you by phone or email as soon as they can and will work with you to make a plan to keep you safe. Find out more information on their website.

    ChildLine offers information, advice and confidential counselling to anyone aged 19 and under on any issue affecting them. Their phoneline is open all day every day by calling on 0800 1111, or you can go to www.childline.org.uk to access their webchat service. They also have a message board for young people on their website .You can also email Childline by signing up for an account and can have 1-on-1 chats with a counsellor when signed into your account.

    Stop it Now is an organisation that gives advice and information for anyone concerned with their own, or another person's thoughts or behaviour towards children. Their helpline number is 0808 1000 900 and they are open Monday-Thursday 9am-9pm and Friday 9am-5pm. If you are in Ireland an alternative helpline number can be found on their website. They also have a live chat that is open various times between 9am and 9pm Monday-Friday. Check the website for specific times. Head to their website www.stopitnow.org.uk to access their live chat, which is open Mondays 9am-12pm, Wednesdays 6pm-9pm and Fridays 9am-2pm.

    Shore is a safe space for teenagers worried about their own or someone else's sexual thoughts, feelings or behaviours, and all of their services are 100% anonymous. They can offer advice and support to help you or someone you know manage worrying thoughts and learn more about living safely both online and offline. Their website offers upfront and clear information on sex and the law. They also have a topic library full of “What to do if…” advice pages. They have a livechat open Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays 5pm-8pm. They also have an anonymous email service where they can answer any questions you may feel uncomfortable asking anyone else. Your email address will be encrypted so they will never see it but you will get the reply sent straight to your inbox. For more information on their services go to https://shorespace.org.uk/

    I dont know any trusted adults I have told her and so have others but she has the mind set that she's not a minor so its okay and this is because of her parents encouraging her and telling her this she also gets upset because she actually knows its wrong but doesn't care you know
  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 1,311 Wise Owl
    Hey @Sims I wonder if you have a parent or guardian you could speak to about this?

    I also hear that there have been other people as well as yourself trying to change her mind about this date. You're doing really well to try and support your friend Sims and we're here to support you through this too. How are you feeling about it now?
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