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Men

bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 325 The Mix Regular
edited July 20 in Health & Wellbeing
From all groups, ages, backgrounds etc. I believe men can have harmful attitudes and behavior. They don’t see women who don’t look like a pornstar as literal scum on a shoe, so it makes me mad at them too. Even my male family members are horrible. One of my brother says he gets mad looking at ugly woman and my gay cousin told a woman he wouldn’t hire her because she’s ugly (this is a job which is unrelated to looks).

I believe men are sometimes conditioned to learn these beliefs to only view women as equal if they could sexually appeal to them.

It’s hard not to be a misandrist when my point is proven everyday.
Post edited by Sian321 on

Comments

  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,698 Extreme Poster
    edited July 20
    @bignosegirly0 declaring all men as the same is like declaring all people of a certain race the same due to certain behaviours of some members of that race. Grouping entire groups together for the actions of a few is not a good path to go down. There are men who are trash, there are also women who are trash, and i am sorry that your experience with men has been awful, but declaring your hate for an entire group of people based on there gender is not productive or decent.

    It's understandable why you feel that way given your experiences with men, and i'm not diminishing your experience, but your hate should be for the individuals who treated you lesser, not blanket insulting half the population.

    Hating all men, will simply push people away. As a man, for me, there was no conditioning, no honing to think that way, because i was pretty much abandoned growing up, and treated like trash. I treat all people with respect and decency which is something that gentlemen should do as i've always thought. I judge people on there actions, nothing else. What you are saying about being honed and conditioned to be degenerates is not true for all men, just a small minority of them. I hope that you can see that labelling an entire gender as degenerate for the actions of a few of that gender is not productive or helpful for you or for anybody.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,611 Legendary Poster
    edited July 20
    i know you’ve been treated badly by men in the past and it’s understandable why you feel like this but labelling all ‘men’ as pigs is not true for every guy..

    i know you may think all men are the same but they aren’t. you will find men who will treat you like a princess and then get some twats who think it’s all abt them but labelling them all as pigs etc is just.. not right.

    i agree with @DonnerKebab ^^
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 2,177 Boards Champion
    edited July 20
    Hey @bignosegirly0 , just a little note here to say we've needed to go ahead and edit your post in accordance with our guidelines as some of what you've expressed here constitutes sexism and discriminatory language which we do not tolerate or allow.

    Whilst we hear the hurt and upset that's underneath these views, please kindly refrain from using discriminatory language, which can be harmful.

    Lets please be mindful that here at The Mix we are inclusive of people of all and every gender, including our male staff, moderators, and male members.
  • independent_independent_ Community Connector Posts: 9,847 Supreme Poster
    I saw this before it was edited and while i understand that might feel like your experience, we have to acknowledge that there are good men out there. There are good men everywhere. Some of my best friends are men. Someone isn’t bad just because they are a man, they might be bad because of their views, but they don’t have those views just because they’re male. It’s like saying that all disabled people are incapable just because they’re disabled. Can I ask if you think along similar lines about other protected groups?
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 325 The Mix Regular
    edited 11:13AM
    @independent_ although I dont have these thoughts about specific protected groups, I have a lot of moments where I just generally hate everyone in this world and believe everyone is a horrible person.


    Edit: just to add, a lot of the times, I also see women behave a lot like the men that I despise. Like when all my male coworkers (yes, this was during a shift where the workplace was filled with mostly men and one woman) were chatting about whether they would have sex with the ugliest female coworkers/managers for £1000. And the only girl also joined in. It makes me so disappointed when woman also behave like men, because they think that they’re one of the good ones in men’s eyes ;(
    Post edited by Katie at
  • AnonymousToeAnonymousToe Posts: 2,722 Boards Guru
    Treating people badly or caring only about sex or appearance or whatever is not ‘behaving like a man’
    You know men who behave like that but that doesn’t mean they all do. There are some lovely men out there, lovely men on The Mix today, in the past, and probably yet to come (if this place sticks around). You’re allowed to be frustrated and to dislike the people in your life who’ve behaved in harmful ways, but you can’t generalise it to being a ‘man thing’. We want men to feel safe here to open up and be themselves, and I don’t think these comments you’re making are very conducive to that.
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