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(Masturbation & OCD) I can only orgasm to my intrusive thoughts please help

bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 325 The Mix Regular
in Health & Wellbeing
I’ve struggled with experiencing intrusive thoughts during masturbation since childhood, and now it’s the only thing that can make me orgasm. When i fantasy about the things I like during masturbation, I feel nothing. But intrusive thoughts makes me orgasm instantly. Even when I look at porn which I like, it doesn’t work for me.

I don’t know what to do. Help
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Comments

  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 2,248 Boards Champion
    edited June 20
    Hey @bignosegirly0 , thank you so much for your courage in sharing this post. I can hear that you feel unsure of what to do, and this has been causing you a lot of anxiety.

    There are other young people who experience intrusive thoughts as part of OCD, and also, intrusive thoughts linked to masterbation too. You're not alone. You can find out more here: https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/masturbating-makes-me-feel-guilty Or here: https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/do-intrusive-thoughts-during-climax-mean-anything

    How has this been affecting you emotionally? I wonder, have you ever recieved any support around OCD or in coping with intrusive thoughts?

    The following organisations are also here for you if you wish for some further help with this:
    https://www.ocduk.org/

    ocdaction.org.uk

    topuk.org
    Self-help therapy groups and support for those with OCD, phobias and related anxiety disorders.
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 325 The Mix Regular
    @Sian321 i feel disgusting and filthy. I would do anything to get rid of this issue. It feels like a cruel joke. I just want to enjoy my sexual fantasies in peace without it being intruded with intrusive thoughts. I feel like a fucking freak. And I’m scared it’s never gonna go away.
  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 2,248 Boards Champion
    @bignosegirly0 , I hear you, and it sounds like you're feeling a lot of shame and anxiety around this too. Have any of the resources we shared above felt helpful at all?

    I wonder whether you've felt able to talk to anyone else in your life about this?
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 325 The Mix Regular
    @bignosegirly0 ive talked about it with a therapist in the past, but we were busy sorting out more important issues. Hence, I’m just trying to help myself overcome this issue. So far, I’ve been getting better.
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