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Me and my ex
Girlieg
Posts: 2 Newbie
Hi,
I am asking for advice on how to get my ex boyfriend back.
For context we broke up in October after things had been rocky for a while. Knowing him and knowing that I needed to focus on my a levels I’ve done my best to give space and keep no contact.
Things ended quite badly between, in the beginning things were really good but things started happening in my life which really took a toll on my mental health, put a strain on our relationship and it took a really big toll on him as well. I basically lost everything. Things with my parents were bad, things with my friendships were bad, things with my school was bad and he was the only thing I had. I really clung to him and was so scared of losing him because he was the one ounce of stability I had. But it became too much.
I had such severe separation anxiety from him, I lost myself completely, I became someone completely unrecognizable. I also was struggling with undiagnosed PMDD and trauma from different things such as passing out because of my period on a plane in a foreign country that I couldn’t speak and it gave me PTSD. Other things happened which I didn’t deal with and I was so depressed, anxious and a wreck. He was destroyed by the end of the relationship.
I really miss him and want him back. He has blocked me on everything for months and I want some advice on how I would approach things with him.
I didn’t want to get better at the time and I understand how it made him feel.
I’ve grown so much as a person, I haven’t changed but I’m able to self regulate, manage my emotions, I’ve started taking medication to help with my PMDD which made everything better. I’m the same person as I was when I entered the relationship like I’m getting myself back.
I’m thinking of sending him a letter in the post. This hurts because he has very valid reasons not to want to hear from me or talk to me because I know how much of a strain me and the relationship took on him. I just want a chance.
Any advice on what I should say? I love with all my heart and still do and just want to try and. I don’t know.
I could do with any advice on what to say.
I am asking for advice on how to get my ex boyfriend back.
For context we broke up in October after things had been rocky for a while. Knowing him and knowing that I needed to focus on my a levels I’ve done my best to give space and keep no contact.
Things ended quite badly between, in the beginning things were really good but things started happening in my life which really took a toll on my mental health, put a strain on our relationship and it took a really big toll on him as well. I basically lost everything. Things with my parents were bad, things with my friendships were bad, things with my school was bad and he was the only thing I had. I really clung to him and was so scared of losing him because he was the one ounce of stability I had. But it became too much.
I had such severe separation anxiety from him, I lost myself completely, I became someone completely unrecognizable. I also was struggling with undiagnosed PMDD and trauma from different things such as passing out because of my period on a plane in a foreign country that I couldn’t speak and it gave me PTSD. Other things happened which I didn’t deal with and I was so depressed, anxious and a wreck. He was destroyed by the end of the relationship.
I really miss him and want him back. He has blocked me on everything for months and I want some advice on how I would approach things with him.
I didn’t want to get better at the time and I understand how it made him feel.
I’ve grown so much as a person, I haven’t changed but I’m able to self regulate, manage my emotions, I’ve started taking medication to help with my PMDD which made everything better. I’m the same person as I was when I entered the relationship like I’m getting myself back.
I’m thinking of sending him a letter in the post. This hurts because he has very valid reasons not to want to hear from me or talk to me because I know how much of a strain me and the relationship took on him. I just want a chance.
Any advice on what I should say? I love with all my heart and still do and just want to try and. I don’t know.
I could do with any advice on what to say.
2
Comments
I can totally understand wanting to send him a letter, and if this is something you really want to do for yourself then I'd say just be honest, explain your thoughts, feelings, how you've been trying to put yourself first and improve your wellbeing. You don't have to discuss anything you're uncomfortable with but honesty is the best policy. If you want to do this the only thing I would say you might want to consider is the possibility that he won't respond back, and that the letter might not lead to anything and if you're okay with that, and can respect him not responding back, and just want to get your feelings out without needing a response or reply then I'd say go ahead. I totally understand how difficult this is for you, and how you're feeling, I would feel the exact same if it were me, so I hope it goes well for you, but most of all I hope you keep putting yourself and your wellbeing first; you deserve to be healthy and happy
Thank you so much!!
I just feel really helpless and hopeless with everything. I do want him back and I don’t know what to do or say.