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Here to support you guys 💕
River
Community Connector Posts: 4,515 The Mix Elder
I’m going to just focus on helping people on here and in chat rather than ask for support and take up space. I’ll reply to peoples posts daily and feel free to tag me in posts if you’d like me to reply to them.
I’m here for you guys and your all deserve of support and all your feelings are valid.
Edit: for those who will say I deserve support thanks but I really don’t, I’m better bottling everything up.
I’m here for you guys and your all deserve of support and all your feelings are valid.
Edit: for those who will say I deserve support thanks but I really don’t, I’m better bottling everything up.
Sometimes when the people most like you don't love you, it is a hurt that can cause the greatest pain, and this pain can lead you to hate everything.
Post edited by River on
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Comments
This may be difficult to hear though now when you are quite stuck
I hope you don't mind me bringing this up, but you mentioned in the chat about how you were afraid of saying something or us getting to know you i think. I'm here to tell you that i don't care if you've committed war crimes or dropped an N bomb. Nothing you say or do will change the fact that we all see how kind of a person you are, and the fact that you deserve support and care.
i don't know if it's the same, but I do know that when you go through utter hell your entire life, and every system that's supposed to help you fails you, it can leave a person feeling undeserving of kindness and support, and destroy their self confidence. I say this from personal experience. And i don't know if this is the exact same for you, But let me tell you something, you do deserve support and kindness. the fact that the people who were supposed to be there for you wasn't doesn't mean your not worth anything. It just means there a bunch of potato brained chicken pasty sniffing baboons, and you deserve MORE kindness and support.
Sorry again if this is a bit of an odd reply. Sending you a virtual hug cause you need one right now. Again, sorry if this is a bit odd or weird.
Think about it like this. This is how i had things explained to me by a counsellor. There's a puppy. And he's in a shelter. And each family that adopts this puppy, they are mean to it. They are supposed to take care of this puppy, and all they do, is treat it like trash. So, it's sent back to the shelter. And it repeats again and again. It's not that the puppy didn't deserve love and care, or was worthless. It's that people who were supposed to be there for him was cruel and let him down. Would you blame the puppy and say the puppy is worthless or that nobody should waste there time on him, or would you blame the buggers who failed him and give the puppy even more care and love? And to make it more interesting, the puppy still goes around being nice to all the others in the shelter even after everything. Probably a bad comparison, but it's the best I've got. You deserve support and care rose the same way the puppy in that story does. It's hard to see it through your eye's for yourself, so think about it like this.
Maybe nothing will change if you reach out and get support you deserve. Maybe it will, maybe it won't, there's no guarantees. The only thing that is guaranteed is that nothing will change if you don't, and it will be harder going through day by day. Your an awesome person, and i think you forget that sometimes. Again, sorry if any of this sounds weird. I'm really bad at talking to people.
If that puppy was in front of you, what would you do?
My opinion is this. 100% the puppy deserves as much kindness love and support as i could give him, and 100% you do too. Just because the people who were supposed to give you that love and kindness didn't, their failing's don't mean you don't deserve it. It just makes them a bunch of potato brained baboons with less moral decency than Kim Jong un, and it also means you deserve even more love and care.
Just, try and imagine it's a little puppy, and it's gone through everything you have. You'd love and care for that puppy and think it deserved all of that kindness you could give him if he was in your shoes. So do you deserve that love care and kindness. There is not a single person on this platform who would disagree with this. Plus, i don't blame you for stealing the puppy. It's a golden retriever in this scenario.
If your past is proof you deserved it, then so is mine. So is everybody else's. You are so much more than you think you are rose. So much more than your past and the failures of those who were supposed to love you and care for you. You never deserved for any of it to happen to you. You deserved to have a happy life, growing up happy. You deserved so much more than this, and it's painful to see just how much you don't feel like you deserve the basic love and kindness that you should have had from day one.
We all love you, care for you and want to support you, because we all think you are worth it, and deserve it. Even if you don't think so. You will never convince us that you don't deserve love and kindness. So please start being kind to yourself.
Now, let me ask you this one instead. if you saw somebody else, who went through exactly what you did. Would you say the same about them? Not a puppy this time. But a person. Or would you help them and show them the kindness they deserved from day one?
I’ve known you for a long time, and I can see how kind, caring, and incredible you are. It’s fair to say you’ve been through hell and back, but none of that is your fault. Not one bit of it. We can’t change our pasts (I’m sure we all wish we could) but what is important is right now. Right now you’re feeling really bad and that’s ok, it’s always ok to be in need of support.
That said, there can be massive benefits to helping others, but only if you’re feeling up to it. You have to look after number one, and number one is yourself. You helped me so much in chat tonight, and I’m really really grateful for that. You are doing so much good in this world, you really are, and you deserve to have good people in your life who are there for you. I know you haven’t always had that, but trust me when I say I’m here, I’m listening, and I care. I’m going to bed shortly, but my inbox is always open, and I (and others) are always here on the boards too.
Please take care and try to be a little bit kind to yourself. Even a tiny little bit. I’m really proud of you
I'm sorry just realised I reacted a agree rather yhan hug I use my phone so bit temperamental..
You deserve support rose and you at wanted here. Your support has been valurd.
99% of people who would go through even a fraction of what you have would be angry, rage full, and turn out cruel, yet here you are, as kind as anything. Supporting and being kind to others even now. That's what's special about you Rose. Don't ever forget that.
1+1 = 2
Pineapple does not go on Pizza
You deserve all the love care and support in the world
These are all factual statements.
You do I promise
I wonder, might there have been anything recently that has intensified these fears about not being worthy of care or kindness? While I've heard you share similar fears in the past, it seems as though this belief has perhaps gotten louder lately, and I'm wondering if something might have triggered this, or maybe I've got the wrong end of the stick!
To echo @independent_ 's message also, offering support and care for others can be such a beautiful thing - and at the exact same time, it's important to take care of one's self too and to listen into your own boundaries about what does or doesn't feel good right now. This is your Community and you belong here whether you're sharing yourself, listen to others, or something in the beautiful grey space in between those two things!
Mm if only that was true
Cheers
i know how you feel about receiving support and that is valid, you’re allowed to feel that way! just know that we all care about you and will be here if you do want to share how you’re feeling at any point - no pressure though, it’s up to you - i promise you are deserving of support though!
we all really appreciate you here and the support that you give to everyone