how my job makes me feel

shannon_164 · April 12

hey🙂

i’m not really too sure where to post this or if there’s even any point in posting it but anyways - i hate my job to put it simply.

i’m really struggling with it and have done since the get go. i am constantly in a panic while here, and before every single shift i actually feel physically unwell, im guessing from the anxiety about coming in. right now i am sat in work on the verge of tears. i always wake up earlier than my alarm and sit in my bed crying and feeling sick - this morning ive been up from about 12:30am ish when i only needed to be up at 1:15am as i started at 3am. it’s draining me so so much. i ended up phoning in sick on thursday morning because of how bad i was feeling over the thought of even coming in, it was definitely the worst experience i’ve had in terms of feeling unwell due to work but i then spent my whole day overthinking the fact i phoned in sick then.

i dont really feel able to talk to anyone in work about how i really feel about the job - whenever everyone is asking am i enjoying it so far (been here about a month), i always say “yeah so far” when the reality is i hate it. the only bit i enjoy is the walk to the car park to leave.

i have an employment officer outside of work but i don’t even know how to approach it with her. i feel like i can’t leave either as i only started recently. i can’t reduce my hours at all as its a 20 hour contract. there’s 0 flexibility.

i hate it here so much:(

Sian321 · April 12

Hey @shannon_164 , how are you doing this morning? I wanted to check in off the back of this post. It sounds like yesterday might have been extreamly overwhelming, and it sounds so hard to have felt that paniced and to be in tears. I hear you saying that you spent the whole day second-guessing the fact that you called in sick, however, it also feels powerful that you listened to yourself and your own boundaries. It sounds so exhausting to feel frightened like that, Shannon, with your whole body on high alert. And you're doing really well to talk about this here.

How are you feeling this morning? How were you able to take care of yourself yesterday, and I wonder if anything helped you to feel safe again when the panic arose?

You mentioned about the hours and not feeling like you can leave right now, and I can imagine that feeling so trapping sometimes. That's extreamly hard. What holds you back at the moment from sharing these feelings with your employment officer?

No pressure at all to answer these questions. Sending lots of care, Shannon, and we're all here for you. I hope you can be extra gentle with yourself today and I'll share below some resources to support with panic and anxiety if helpful:

DARE Panic and Anxiety Relief is an app designed for people coping with worry, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, insomnia, or panic attacks - helping you to regain confidence and live life at its fullest. While certain parts of the app require payment to be unlocked, there are hundreds of free features and the app itself is free to download. Some of the apps' free features include a bank of "SOS" step-by-step audioguides to help you calm down during a panic attack and to manage your intrusive thoughts, based on the evidence-based DARE technique by Barry McDonagh (BA, Dip Psych). The app also includes free breathing exercises, soothing meditations, and motivational 'pep talks' to help encourage and reassure you. It can be downloaded on the Apple App Store or the Google Play store.

Chill Panda is an NHS app that helps young people to better understand their stress and shows you ways to help them cope and feel better. They have breathing exercises, yoga sessions, exercises and calming games to help you with anxiety. The app is available for download on the Apple app store and Google Play for Android. It is also available on the Nintendo Switch. Find out more information on www.chillpanda.co.uk

Stress & Anxiety Companion is an NHS-approved mental health app for managing work-related stress and anxiety. The app provides tools, guides and practical exercises built around proven CBT. You can create a personalised mental wellbeing plan and receive a daily strategy based on your needs, access their bespoke library of 150+ expert audio guides across 40+ topics, and access training workshops including video recordings and presentations once the training is complete. It's there for you 24/7. The app is available to download on both the Apple app store and Google Play. To download or for more information go to https://www.companionapproach.com/stress-anxiety-companion-app

There's an organisation called Anxiety UK which offers support and information for people who experience anxiety disorders such as panic attacks, phobias, obsessive compulsive disorders, social anxiety and associated depressions. You can book a call with an advisor on their website for their service called Tauk to us. You can also call 03444 775 774 to receive automated information on their service. This is available 24/7. Their email address is support@anxietyuk.org.uk and you can also go to their website for more information, or for their counselling services at https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/

Redemption · April 12

@shannon_164 I've been hearing how overwhelming things have been for you the past few months and really sad to hear this with your job. Sounds like this is really affecting your mental and physical health. Im so sorry to hear hear all this it sounds really horrible. If you need anything you know where I am and we're all here for you ♥️

shannon_164 · April 13

hey @Sian321 🙂

i just feel really anxious and unwell again, but that’s because i have work at 11am:( i hate how it makes me feel, and the more shifts i work, the worse it all gets.

when i feel in a complete panic, it just lasts for ages. i can’t do anything in that moment. yesterday i was in such a panic and then suddenly i was surrounded by about 30+ passengers queuing that i had to speak to then but i also felt unable to even talk. it was the worst feeling. i was also alone so i couldn’t even rely on anybody else to do the talking and i just then help them with popping a tag onto their cabin baggage to make it slightly easier for me.

i don’t really know what it is that holds me back tbh:/ i told her about the interview that i have at the end of the month though and she said about helping me to prepare for that. i really do want that job which is making me feel more under pressure i guess because it’s not just a job i’ve applied to for the sake of it, it’s a job i applied to because i genuinely do want it.

i really hope that i can leave the airport soon as i really am hating it.

thank you for your reply

how my job makes me feel

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