helplines tw// mentions of suicidal thoughts

struggling0_0 · March 22

everyone always goes on n on about helplines and how i should reach out to them when im struggling. well i done that. i am struggling. i tried shout, lifeline & samaritans. the wall beside me has been a better support… of course i will still be in the wrong though as i always am, its always my fault.

shout - just wasn’t a very helpful conversation at all and i felt as if i was talking to a robot tbh, they seemed in a complete rush to try and end the convo:/

lifeline - with lifeline, you often speak to the same people so the person i spoke to tonight i’ve spoke to her several times before, and she is usually alright but tonight, she was so unhelpful. she advised me that because i have a job and i can drive myself to work my life is actually ok. i don’t think having a job and being able to drive eliminates all mental health struggles however…

samaritans - she blamed me for the call being unhelpful… she kept talking over me too which was really frustrating me. i said “i don’t know what i need / want. i’m really struggling and simply don’t want to be here anymore” and she then let out the biggest sigh ever. she was coming across so frustrated too. then she said i could phone back again if im actually struggling and i just said “you know what i give up. i’m done trying to ask for help because no one cares” and she just said “ok” and hung up.

is it any wonder people dont reach out…?

*i am safe right now and have no plans / intentions, i was just wanting to be listened to tonight*

Lottie5433 · March 22

I'm sorry to hear your have had these experiences with helplines, you deserve to be listened to and supported not invalidated or essentially pushed aside.

I completly understand what you are saying about

everyone always goes on n on about helplines and how i should reach out to them when im struggling

and where your coming from with the helplines lack of empathy and support when your clearly going through alot and it has taken courage to actually reach out.

From personal experiences I've not used lifeline, but have had the same encounter with Shout and they are often my last resort.
Have you tried the Samaritains web-chat service (I'm not sure if it's open across the whole UK yet) but ive found that service to be a bit better than phoning them. But it's complelty valid on how you feel about their service in general.

Just know your feelings and struggles are completely valid ❤️ always here if you need someone to listen. Send hugs and support your way 🫂

independent_ · March 22

I used to work on the other side of a helpline, I’m not gonna say which one publicly but if you want to know I’m happy to tell you on PM. I completely understand what you mean about the robotic type responses. It’s worth noting that the vast majority of us really really do want to help (at least I did) but our training limits what we can do and/or say. There were many times where I had something I wanted to say, but I couldn’t say it because it would go against our training model, etc. Just know that the person at the other end really wants to help and probably wishes they could say more to you, especially if they have personal experience, which many helpline workers do

Invisible_me · March 22

Hey I can hear how fustarting this wad for you and can understand why.

Shout they take forever and I've heard many unhelpful experience
Samiritans I tend to emailz uts okayish..

Have you tried papyrus/hopelineuk? They're quite quick and better than shout!

helplines tw// mentions of suicidal thoughts

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