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Frustrated

VerinelinVerinelin Posts: 13 Settling in
edited February 28 in Health & Wellbeing
I've started self-harming again because I've been so anxious but it makes me feel bad as I hadn't self-harmed in a while. It's all so frustrating and upsetting.
Post edited by Verinelin on

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    nat_nat_ Moderator Posts: 53 Boards Initiate
    @Verinelin we hope youre okay <3, Remember you are not alone and we are all here for you. Do you feel comfy sharing more with us about what's been going on for you? Can you also share if you're feeling safe this morning? We really care about you.

    If you're struggling and need immediate support, remember you're not alone. I've listed some services below for you which are always available for you to use if you need a chat:
    * If you need urgent help or have any concerns for your health or safety, the quickest way to get help is to call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. 
    *Crisis Messenger - Our crisis messenger text service provides free, 24/7 crisis support across the UK. If you’re aged 25 or under, you can text THEMIX to 85258.
    * Papyrus - If you are having thoughts of suicide, you can contact HOPELINEUK for confidential support and practical advice. You can call them on 0800 068 4141 or text them on 07786209697.
    * Samaritans are reachable by phone and email 24/7. Whatever you're going through, you can call them any time, from any phone on 116 123.

    please keep us updated on how you are <3
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    Sunshine12Sunshine12 Posts: 90 Budding Regular
    Verinelin wrote: »
    I've started self-harming again because I've been so anxious but it makes me feel bad as I hadn't self-harmed in a while. It's all so frustrating and upsetting.

    Hey lovely, I hope you're feeling a bit better today <3 Relapsing isn't something u should feel bad about because it's totally normal to have bad days where u feel anxious even though I understand it's frustrating, recovery is a process and there's no such thing as a perfect recovery, everyone's recovery looks different. The important thing to know is that there are lots of ppl here who care about U and ur safety and we're more than happy to discuss anything that's making u feel anxious because u deserve to feel happy! Sending lots of love <3
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    VerinelinVerinelin Posts: 13 Settling in
    Thank you, @nat_ @Sunshine12 I'm OK, I just think there are a few things making me anxious. It's the first time in a while that I have nothing to do (I took a break from uni and don't have a job) which has given me a lot of time to think which is never great for me. I also have a family party coming up which I always hate because they're really loud and overwhelming. Plus, I've started worrying that I'm being watched all the time (like cameras around the house) and I'm finding it harder to tell myself that's not true so I find myself restricting what I do which is also making me really anxious. I also just don't have the motivation to distract myself from the things making me anxious so I just spend my time thinking about them which isn't helpful
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    JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,319 Part of The Furniture
    edited February 29
    I hear you @Verinelin. The tricky thing about addictions, habits, or anxious thoughts, is that they can creep into the downtime in your day. I understand the motivation issue though - the lack of motivation to do things and knowing you need distractions can be a nasty combination.

    Is there anything you can do that doesn't require motivation or that's quite brainless? For example, for me that's hoovering, cleaning, or maybe going to the cinema.

    I also want to echo what @Sunshine12 said - relapse is an expected part of recovery. I remember once, someone explained it to me as a muscle that builds over time. Relapse is very likely, especially at first, but over time you strengthen that muscle and relapses get less frequent. It's a thing that genuinely requires learning and practice, and relapse is required for recovery (and isn't a moral failing).

    Also, self-harming now doesn't take away from everything you did to go so long without doing it. That took a lot of work, and you still get to hold the credit for that. :)
    The truth resists simplicity.
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    Sunshine12Sunshine12 Posts: 90 Budding Regular
    Hey @Verinelin I'm glad you're feeling ok today. Take your time away from uni and work as the perfect time to find a new hobby! what better way to relieve stress and take ur mind off things than doing a new hobby or activity. Personally, I've always wanted to start playing an instrument =) . Also, try not to worry about the family party, hopefully ur family would understand if u took some time out and listened to some music to help with the noise issues. Sending love <3
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