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talking to people

yanayana Community Champion Posts: 1,277 Wise Owl
edited January 12 in Health & Wellbeing
Hey everyone, I hope you've had a great thursday <3

This is pretty random and I'm not really sure how to explain it but does anyone else have problems with making faces while you talk to other people? I'm a social butterfly and I'd much rather spend all day talking to people rather than sitting alone and letting my thoughts take over (which is crazy considering this time 3 years ago my social anxiety was insane) but I just feel like I'm doing something wrong when I'm talking to someone.

If someone is venting to me for example, I'm more than happy to listen and offer advice and support afterwards but i just really struggle to sit there and lisyen while they're talking. If i stare blankly at them it looks like I've zoned out. If i just nod along i look like one of those bobble heads or whatever they're called. I also look like I'm not interested in what they're saying, it'll look like I'm just nodding for the sake of it. What I end up doing a lot of the time is interrupting to be like 'omg that's crazy my sister is the same but yeah continue' or I'll be like 'woah what a bitch' just so i dont sound rude and it's clear to them i am listening but then I'm worried it just makes me sound like I'm a rude cow for interrupting them. I just feel very self conscious about my facial expressions and it definitely stresses me out way more than it needs to.

My facial expressions have always been like automatic, i don't plan every time i smile, it's a natural response to whatever I'm experiencing but lately it's like my facial muscles are kind of stuck and idk what to do. That probably makes no sense and sounds strange but that's tbe best way i can explain this.

But it isn't only just facial expressions it's just everything I day and do, I'm becoming extra self conscious again. I'm not sure if my social anxiety is coming back, it doesn't really feel like social anxiety, it just feels like intense overthinking. I'm not sure.

So yeah i was just wondering if anyone else struggles with this or if I'm just a weirdo lol. Any advice would be greatly appreciated :)
my brain is not braining the way brains are meant to brain

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    AnonymousToeAnonymousToe Posts: 1,021 Wise Owl
    I struggle with this, as well as everything else to do with talking to people. I have social anxiety 😂
    I dont know how to help you (sorry) but I’m really bad at making like any facial expressions at all. It all feels so awkward and unnatural.
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    Amy22Amy22 Posts: 4,017 Community Veteran
    Hey @Xee honestly I am the same as well. I always find it so so hard to start a proper conversation in real life especially at the moment when talking to work colleagues on my apprenticeship. I just don't know what to talk about. At home I find it easier because then its just only my mum and dad and like I feel confindent talking around them. But at other times im very awkward and look strange to others when I talk. Im not very good with facial expressions either because sometimes people think I looked worried when I am not. So I can totally understand and relate to you with the facial expressions thing. Also you are not a weirdo at all for struggling to socialise with others at all as it can be a very tricky thing to learn and do especially when you have social anxiety mixed in as well too. Im always here if you need anything <3.
    Just a person who likes pop culture and films
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    ameliaJayneameliaJayne Moderator Posts: 58 Boards Initiate
    Hi @Xee I hope you have been having a great week!

    This is not random at all I know lots of people who find some difficulties in socialising and responding in conversations the same way you do! I know I have had similar thoughts in the past too.

    It’s brilliant that you love to socialise and especially as it sounds like this is something you used to struggle with!

    You need to give yourself much more credit when you’re having a conversation with someone. The fact you enjoy talking to people and are happy to listen to them talk or vent to you is a really lovely thing to do as a friend. I’m also sure that even though you feel like you may be moving your head too much or interrupting someone, this definitely isn’t the case. Have you considered asking a friend or family member for their opinion on this? I’m sure they would also tell you that you’re doing great and that you are a good listener!

    Let me know how it goes!
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