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Just needed to get it off my chest. *TRIGGER WARNING*
Oli123
Posts: 26 Boards Initiate
Hey everyone.
It's been a while since I've posted here (I think the last time I was online was January) but I'm just having a really bad day and just wanted to get it off my chest.
*TRIGGER WARNING, POST CONTAINS TALK ABOUT KNIVES/BLADES AND POTENTIAL INJURY*
My older sister and I don't really have the best relationship. Just the usual, ignoring each other, bickering etc.
We have a kind of small kitchen that when 2 people are there, it's a little tight space-wise.
I went down earlier to get a drink. She was there chopping something on a chopping board with a really sharp knife.
I was about to go past her and she said, whilst pointing the knife towards me "I'm over here at the moment, go and wait, I will be 5 minutes". I told her that I only wanted a drink and would be gone in 20 seconds, I just needed a glass. She said "I don't care, go away, I will be 5 minutes" whilst still pointing the knife at me. I went to go and walk past her anyway and she moved to the side so that she was now stood in front of me with the knife at stomach level on me and about 2 feet away from me (if she'd slipped I would have been hit with it). I told her to get the knife away from me, and she once again told me to get lost. I raised my voice and told her to get the knife the hell away from me. I then asked her to move so I could open the fridge, and she just said in a high and mighty tone "When dad finds out how you've been acting, pushing in here like this, WiFi will be turned off, I hope you're looking forward to that". So I just tried to open the fridge door anyway, and in response she kicked me as hard as she could in my shin. She does these type of things like punching me hard in the arm or kicking me hard in the legs when she's not happy about something, and this has been going on ever since we were 5 and 7 kind of ages. My mum and dad always told her that one day I would be bigger than her and hit her back (I am now half a foot taller than her and way stronger), but she still never stopped. I never ever retaliate with violence, I absolutely hate hitting people, but I snapped and kicked her back (nowhere near as hard as she kicked me, but it was enough to set her off). So she started coming at me with the knife and waving it at me wildly. If I hadn't stepped back she would definitely have cut me. She was trying to kick me even harder, but I put my hands in the way (in the process hurting my wrists because she kicked me so hard that my wrist got bent backwards to an unnatural angle). I don't know whether she had some sort of sense in her mind to tell her not to actually cut me, but I am surprised that I didn't come away with some form of cut from the way she was acting. I started screaming for my dad and she immediately started to back off. He came in and she immediately goes "OLIVIA KICKED ME DAD". I told him calmly that she'd just been pointing a knife at me and just left the room. I went and had a good cry over it. For the first time in years, she truly scared me. I thought she was going to kill me, or at least hospitalise me. Over a drink of water and her lack of flexibility.
Through tears I told my mum what happened. Mum and dad are appalled by how she acted and they are having extensive words with her. But I just wanted to get it off my chest somewhere other than my family, and not with my friends, cause I never want them to find out that my sister can act like this... What upsets me the most is that she can be so two-faced. Awful to me at any chance she gets, and so sweet and nice with everyone else outside of the family (especially her boyfriend - good luck to him). She wasn't always like this. I don't know what's changed but I truly feel like she hates me.
It's been a while since I've posted here (I think the last time I was online was January) but I'm just having a really bad day and just wanted to get it off my chest.
*TRIGGER WARNING, POST CONTAINS TALK ABOUT KNIVES/BLADES AND POTENTIAL INJURY*
My older sister and I don't really have the best relationship. Just the usual, ignoring each other, bickering etc.
We have a kind of small kitchen that when 2 people are there, it's a little tight space-wise.
I went down earlier to get a drink. She was there chopping something on a chopping board with a really sharp knife.
I was about to go past her and she said, whilst pointing the knife towards me "I'm over here at the moment, go and wait, I will be 5 minutes". I told her that I only wanted a drink and would be gone in 20 seconds, I just needed a glass. She said "I don't care, go away, I will be 5 minutes" whilst still pointing the knife at me. I went to go and walk past her anyway and she moved to the side so that she was now stood in front of me with the knife at stomach level on me and about 2 feet away from me (if she'd slipped I would have been hit with it). I told her to get the knife away from me, and she once again told me to get lost. I raised my voice and told her to get the knife the hell away from me. I then asked her to move so I could open the fridge, and she just said in a high and mighty tone "When dad finds out how you've been acting, pushing in here like this, WiFi will be turned off, I hope you're looking forward to that". So I just tried to open the fridge door anyway, and in response she kicked me as hard as she could in my shin. She does these type of things like punching me hard in the arm or kicking me hard in the legs when she's not happy about something, and this has been going on ever since we were 5 and 7 kind of ages. My mum and dad always told her that one day I would be bigger than her and hit her back (I am now half a foot taller than her and way stronger), but she still never stopped. I never ever retaliate with violence, I absolutely hate hitting people, but I snapped and kicked her back (nowhere near as hard as she kicked me, but it was enough to set her off). So she started coming at me with the knife and waving it at me wildly. If I hadn't stepped back she would definitely have cut me. She was trying to kick me even harder, but I put my hands in the way (in the process hurting my wrists because she kicked me so hard that my wrist got bent backwards to an unnatural angle). I don't know whether she had some sort of sense in her mind to tell her not to actually cut me, but I am surprised that I didn't come away with some form of cut from the way she was acting. I started screaming for my dad and she immediately started to back off. He came in and she immediately goes "OLIVIA KICKED ME DAD". I told him calmly that she'd just been pointing a knife at me and just left the room. I went and had a good cry over it. For the first time in years, she truly scared me. I thought she was going to kill me, or at least hospitalise me. Over a drink of water and her lack of flexibility.
Through tears I told my mum what happened. Mum and dad are appalled by how she acted and they are having extensive words with her. But I just wanted to get it off my chest somewhere other than my family, and not with my friends, cause I never want them to find out that my sister can act like this... What upsets me the most is that she can be so two-faced. Awful to me at any chance she gets, and so sweet and nice with everyone else outside of the family (especially her boyfriend - good luck to him). She wasn't always like this. I don't know what's changed but I truly feel like she hates me.
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Comments
Can I ask has she got any kind of disability or something like that that makes her do things like this. Again I am really sorry you had to deal with something like this please remember that you are strong and loved by many people even people you don’t know in person you always have us you could call us your online friends who will help you whenever and whatever you need help with it’s always good to have online friends too 💛💛💛💛🥰
If you want a chat just dm me:)
Alina x
I'm sorry you have to go through that with your sister. Having someone hate you is one thing but having your own blood show aggressive behaviour towards you is another.
I agree with @_Tech_Addict_Girl here. You did an incredibly brave thing. If your sister is going out her way to harm you then I personally suspect that something is going on with her. There's a reason behind everything, and sometimes the reasoning isn't always pretty.
Hope you're doing okay.
We're here if you need someone to talk to!
In response to Alina, my sister doesn't have any formally-diagnosed disability or mental illness, but she has been depressed in the past and tends to take out her frustrations on people.
She can't really see what she did wrong, which worries the heck out of me. My dad had a word with her about pointing knives at people but all she did was say 'I have a headache go away" to get out of the conversation.
It's kind of become old news at this point. She is being on and off nice to me (she can be all sweet one minute and awful the next). I don't know whether we will ever get back to a close sister relationship at this point. She just seems to have a problem with me most days.
I'm currently doing work from home cause of covid, and need to have my own space to work in. The problem is that whenever I work in my room, she comes in without asking and disturbs me, which makes me lose my concentration. I have a sign on my door now saying "working don't come in" whenever I'm working, and there is (as of a week ago) a new family agreement that when it's up you don't come in my room.
My sister continuously ignores the sign and just comes in whenever she pleases. This morning the sign was on my door and she goes from outside "Morning! Can I come in? I'm bored". I told her no and she went off in a huff. I've resorted to buying myself a lock for my door (a removable one, not screwed into the wood or anything. Just a device that stops the door being opened) just to stop people coming in my room whenever they please. My parents were fuming over it. They said it was offensive that I'd bought it and I should just do a better job of making sure people know not to come in my room. I still have the lock and use it when I need to, because without it I get zero privacy. It also makes me feel safe when I've had a row with someone and want solace away from them in my room (otherwise I would be spending the evening sitting against my door to make sure they don't come in in a rage).
Anyway..thank you all again for your kindness 🧡
First of all, I am really sorry to hear that you are having to go through this. It must be so challenging for you, so well done for telling The Mix and your parents - you're very brave for doing that.
I have just one question if you don't mind me asking, has your sister ever spoken to a professional counsellor/psychologist/therapist? The only reason that I ask, is because a professional counsellor/therapist might be able to help her come to terms with what she is struggling with or the emotions that she is having to deal with behind the surface and then they could help her come up with ideas on how to cope with her feelings and emotions in a healthy and positive mindset.
If not, maybe you could suggest this idea to your parents and they could gently ask her if she would be up for taking this idea on board.
Lastly, I wanted to reassure you that you don't deserve to be dealing with this, and that it is not your fault that this is happening to you. It sounds to me anyway, that your sister is lashing out on you as she is struggling to come to terms with the difficulties that she is facing and the emotions that she is feeling behind the surface, and because you're a younger brother to her, she feels as if she can get away with her behavior towards you as she has 'authority' over you - but this definitely shouldn't be the way as you deserve to be treated with kindness and respect from your sister.
Sending you lots of big virtual hugs your way.