A bit stuck

Shotty · May 2020

Im stuck. I currently gettimg referred back and forth between different mental health services but its going nowhere.

I get these like episodes where i just lose touch with reality. I can barely move or speak when it happens. Sometimes it lasts a few minutes to a few hours or even days. I see myself when it happens if that makes sense? The voices get louder and numbers and patterns start flying. Im obsessed with counting numbers and words. Like the word Cheese is equal to 9. 6 letters and 3 holes. Words equal numbers depending on lines holes and dots. It sounds mad but i dont know what to do. I cant read books because it all just flys about then the numbers start so i have to keep counting. Can go into the thousands when it gets bad. Also i shake badly when i have these episodes. Almost like a seizure

Shotty · May 2020

Also if i touch my face it doesnt feel like my hand. And someyimes i cant eat because my food keeps getting poisoned. Not literally but its soo deeply embedded in my head it wont stop

JustV · May 2020

How long have you been having these symptoms, @Shotty? Welcome, by the way.

We're not medical professionals and can't diagnose anything online, but we can offer some suggestions as to what you might experiencing and how you can get support for it. You mentioned you're being referred back and forth between mental health services, which sounds super frustrating. What have they said (if anything) about the symptoms you've just described to us?

The 'outer body experience' you describe sounds a bit like some form of dissociation. Mind have some pretty comprehensive information on what different things can come under that umbrella: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/dissociation-and-dissociative-disorders/dissociative-disorders/

Again though, we're not professionals and I'm mindful that you've described quite a few different experiences that could all be part of different things. I'll let someone chip in with more insight.

What you described sounds so, so difficult to go through. When your reality starts bending in those ways, I imagine it can be pretty distressing, and you're doing well to talk about it here and reach out.

Laine · May 2020

That sounds like an awful lot to be dealing with!

What have the mental health services said?
Seems terrible to just leave you and pass you around when you're experiencing something like this.

I agree with Mike on the dissociation it sounds like it could be that, usually feels as though you are floating around your body or you're just not in it.

I'm not a medical professional but the number and word counting could be linked in to OCD? I'm by no means suggesting you have such just that you may have some of the behaviours.

Looking up com and rituals may help with it, there may be things online that could help you

When you say it's deeply embedded in your head do you keep hearing it? For instance if my brain keeps telling me "it's hot outside"

That may be intrusive thoughts which are hard to shake off they can come on and often take over.

It sounds like a very hard time and you're doing great talking about it

Have you tried talking to your GP? Tell them what you're experiencing and how you are just getting passed around to different services

They may be able to refer you to a local mental health team and go from there?

A bit stuck

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