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Worried about my sister

Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
so my sister brokeup from her boyfriend on the 15th of March 2017 after being together for nearly 2 years. Anyway she stopped eating and I know for a fact she has lost weight since it has happened. I'm worried that her health is going to go down hill like mine is. I just don't know how I can help her when I'm currently going through anorexia myself as I know she probably will use that against me considering I went through it back in June when I ended up in hospital because it got really bad and now its happening to me again! Don't know what to do because I'm really worried about my sister and I want to help her but I feel she will use my illness against me

Comments

  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Laura,

    I'm sorry to hear that you're worried about your sisters weight loss. Going through a breakup is such a challenging time, so it's really great your looking for advice on how to best support her. It sounds like things are really difficult at the moment and you're worrying a lot. There's some advice on the rethink.org website here - it mentions encouraging your sister to talk through how she's feeling can help her feel less on her own. Also spending time with your sister to help her feel less isolated. It will take time and sometimes your sister might not want to do these things or open up about how she's feeling, but knowing that you've offered to be there can be really nice to hear.

    I've included a few bits of advice the article gives below:
    Talking and Listening

    Encouraging your brother or sister to talk through how they are feeling can help them to feel less on their own and isolated. Listening to them without judging what they say, being sympathetic and patient and taking time to talk with them are all things that can help.

    Depending on the type of mental illness your sibling is experiencing, they may or may not realise that they are experiencing mental ill health to begin with, and in some cases it may be difficult to talk to them about how they are feeling or what they are thinking. Simply showing that you are there to listen when they are ready to talk can give them the opportunity to open up, or to seek help.

    Accept changes

    It can be really difficult to cope when you are trying to support your sibling, but it is not working out as as quickly as you would hope. Try to accept that although you can try and help, your sibling's mental health is not in your control.

    Your sibling may have a quick and full recovery, or it could take some time for them to start to feel better and manage their illness. Try to give support where you feel comfortable, while also making sure that you look after yourself too and don't take on too much, as your mental health is important too.

    How are things going at the moment with your sister? Have you been able to speak to her about anything? Do feel free to keep posting here whenever you need to, we are here for you :)
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Hi Aife. Thanks for the reply. Yeh I'm worried about her. Yeh I want to support her as much as possible. She is getting over it now so hopefully she will start eating more!!!! Ill have a look at the information thanks. I haven't been able to speak about it because she has got annoyed at my parents about it and because of my illness I feel it will make things worse! Thanks means a lot x
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,288 Part of The Furniture
    How're things going at the moment, Laura? :)
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
  • Laura12345Laura12345 Posts: 265 The Mix Regular
    Things aren't too bad thanks although she has been physically ill tonight but we don't know why! Worried it's because of her sitution in with her weight though. My health still isn't good too be honest which is worrying me and comments at work makes it harder
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