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Making this summer more bearable

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am home from university for the summer and I'm already going mad. My parents are splitting up and they're moving to their new respective homes on the 31st of July. I have my work (which I hate) but that is about it at the moment.

I've been growing apart from my friends herefor a long time, and we have nothing in common any more. I don't like them much now - lots of them are users now and as I've grown up and changed, they haven't. We live in a VERY rural area, and as I can't drive, I have barely any opportunities to do anything that doesn't involve my house, or the forest.

My mother has never been an easy person to get along with and now with all the stress of the house moving, she is insufferable. I find it difficult to spend any time at all with her without getting into an argument, so I spend most of my free time in my room.

All I have to do is read, play the piano, faff around on the internet and work. I HATE it all. Every time I see a postcard from my friends that aren't from here, or a picture on Facebook of them doing fun things I end up crying.

What can I do to make this summer more bearable? I find it difficult to get through a day, let alone the next two months.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Grace

    Sorry to hear things are tough. I'm in a similar position in that I've been home from uni for over a week now and haven't met up with a single friend (lots of them aren't based at home anymore).

    Could you look at getting a different job? Perhaps plan on visiting uni friends when you have some time off?

    I've found getting into a routine has helped me since I've gone from having loads to do at uni to having nothing. For example my day is filled with dog walks, going to the gym, sometimes cooking. I'm also studying towards a qualification that I hadn't had the time to do whilst I was so busy at uni - I remember you're into languages, fancy learning another one? Maybe learning to drive?

    Keep an eye out for local events too, I guess it could be a way of meeting new people :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Grace its Crazykiss here, I don't understand how come u have lost touch with ur friends? Is it cuz with ur parents splitting up that maybe its had an big impact on ur life? Maybe that's why things arnt the same anymore but when something like this happens u think that it's ur fault for u splitting them up and u wish u wernt born because of it but its got nothing to do with that at all. Don't think with ur parents splitting up has got anything to do with u. They love u just the same and these incidents happen in life. When u leave ur old friends behind to go to uni or college u think that they will only be ur only friends but that's not true as when ur with new bunch of people in ur year there will be times when u have to do projects or assessments in order to do work so with that being u will have to engage with others around u from time to time. It's not a bad thing that ur make new friends and leave ur old friends behind although sometimes it can be a good thing to knowing that ur gonna find others with the same interests as u so its only adding to ur circle of friends more. Hopefully one day u and ur old friends will get back in touch but for now concentrate on uni and meeting new people to where u want to go in life. As for ur mum and dad well leave them be as they wouldn't want u to get upset when u already got enough on ur plate with uni etc. Getting out the house everyday will do u the world of good even if it's just to the shop or into town ur still doing something with ur time and that way u and ur mum can have some time apart. I'm sure it's not easy for her either but maybe she needs a break from this two for both of u to realise how much u love each other and why u need this break. I'm sure there's more about this article on the site.org where u will find topics on a range of things which will help in the long run. Good Luck with uni and stay strong.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Can you get vacation from your job? You could go around the UK by train couch surfing/hiking or something like that.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's true StrubbleS. Going away on holiday as part of ur job can get u socialising with other people and be away from home a bit as that's what u need. I dont know how often they do this where u currently work at but talking to ur manager will give u some more advice about. Atleast it gets u out of the house.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for your replies :heart:

    I've been applying for any jobs that catch my eye, but really, I don't think it's likely that I'd ever get an enjoyable summer job. I guess it's something that I just have to put up with.

    I don't have the chance to go away; I need to use my time off for house moving because my parents want me to help them, especially my mum. I've got things planned for when I have a day or two off though, I'm going to stay with my sister for a night and I'll go up to London at another point and so on. When I move, though, when I visit my mum I'll be in a city centre so, depending on work schedule, I'll see if I can volunteer at the arts' centre for an hour or two a week.

    I've been learning Icelandic though! Idk I might try and take it a bit more seriously and set myself like an hour to do a day or something. I wanted to keep it fun and only do it when I wanted to but a bit of structure would do me good. I might set myself things to learn on the piano and stuff too.

    Local events aren't really a thing here; there's an occasional Abba tribute band in a pub or something but that's about it. And I don't think there's any way to meet new people, it's impossible to walk down the street without meeting somebody I know and who thinks I'm an uppity posh cow for having been the one that lost her accent and left here. Maybe after moving there'll be more people to meet though!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dont seem at all bad when u put it like that. Atleast there's some postive strategies coming along for u to get out of the house or to spend sometime with ur sister in London so u do have some things keeping u busy at the moment. It's great that when u and ur parents move u can start up a class in arts which is a great way of meeting new people and making new friends. I think this move will be good for u as I think a new scenery is what u need and there will be slot more opportunities for u in ur area this time as before u had nothing to do. I'm pleased things have worked out well for u. It's only now to start planning ahead to going places in having a new career on ur side. Keep up with good luck and was nice to hear from u .
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