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What's left?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
"Talk to someone"

"Speak to your doctor"

"Distract yourself"

I've tried all of those. I've tried to reach out to people - over the last few weeks and then again tonight because I feel so damn shit. I've been getting 'professional help' for 18 months here now. No improvement. I've given up going now. I've tried to distract myself. Tonight I asked my housemate if he wanted to do something tonight, he said yes and that his girlfriend was coming over for dinner but leaving afterwards so around 8 would be good. Bring on 10pm and no word from him. Not even like it's a one off. Even if they make plans the time rolls around and I get a cancellation text - and that's if I'm lucky.

Feeling so so bad. I TRY and TRY with people. It's crystal clear what people think of me.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh honey I'm sorry. I'm not in a position to be helping anyone right now.

    I promise that it's not because of you. You are wonderful and I would be doing anything I could if I wasn't in such a bad place myself.

    I love you x
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You don't need to be sorry
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What's left is pretty much everything.

    It's the high points, that even if they seem a million miles away you know still exist. It's the buzz of being alive and free that you get walking along a beah in the sinshine, or the bite of the wind. It's the grin you get from small kids. It's the satisfaction of finishing something. It's the high of winning a game, the low of losing and the buzz of playing.

    It's the brain dead point you reach when you finish a tricky bit of uni work. It's the improvement you make to a patients life, be that by doing clever medicine, or just listening to what they say and making them think you care.

    It's the tired muscles after going for a run on the beach.

    It's all the little things that make up life. I know they can seem to be a million miles away, or almost impossible to reach - but flick through some old photos, and that might prompt what the good bits look like.

    xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    :no:
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