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6 months on and I'm still angry

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
I don't think angry is the right word really ??

I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years in the summer after not feeling like he had time for me that I wasn't supported by him and him immediately taking sides with his best friend after he gave me a stripping down outlining all my personal faults. We met up for a couple of times after we split just as friends and then I decided to stop as I wanted to start dating again. I have been on a few dates nothing serious as of yet but I am still so cut up about how he doesn't even see what he's done wrong, and he seemed to think we could be friends still. I miss him but not who he is now who he was before. I miss being that close to someone. I keep getting so angry with him when I see/listen/even smell something that reminds me of him I feel like he didn't respect what we had as much as I did. I feel like going and telling him exactly how I feel about what he did, how I feel like be betrayed me by not even hearing what I had to say when I came home from meeting up with his friend (this was meant to be a business meeting).

What do I do? Do I just drop it and hope that these feelings go away do I tell him or do I just go fuck someone and get it all out of my system?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think that feeling angry about a break up is very similar to feeling upset and emotional about it. Basically no matter what you feel towards him youre not moving on which is the main thing.

    Going and telling him what he's done to you probably wont do anything. It wont change what he's done and it wont change your relationship. Going on the rebound wont work either (although its the most fun option ;))

    You need to treat this as though you;re emotionally cut up about him. Hide and/or destroy everything that reminds you of him, pictures, presents etc. Delete or just hide him from facebook/twitter/whatever. Delete his number.

    The sooner he is out of your life completely, the sooner you'll see that your life is better without the thought of him in it winding you up. He's not the worth the energy or the high blood pressure :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it's normal.
    last time it took me more than a year to get over something like this.
    and i am still hurt.
    it all depends on how emotional you are
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've done all of that Lexi99 I've even stopped going to the places where he goes and I've stopped being friends with any of his friends. Its stupid things like seeing chicken and sweetcorn soup in the supermarket because I used to make it for him from scratch making my own stock and everything and he didn't really seem to appreciate the effort I put into it. It just makes me angry and I feel like I'll never do things like that for anyone if they don't really make it known how much they appreciate me and my efforts. I don't know what to do about it, or if feeling like that is normal?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yea, don't confront him about it, he won't care and it's not worth it to show him you are butthurt.

    Just throw everything out that is his, or reminds you off him and stop being in contact with him. Then, just give it time.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    darkshines wrote: »
    I miss him but not who he is now who he was before

    At least you're aware of this. Sometimes I've found the hardest part is really admitting that to yourself when you're still wrapped up in your feelings. Keeping him out of your life entirely until you feel better is the best idea.
    darkshines wrote: »
    It just makes me angry and I feel like I'll never do things like that for anyone if they don't really make it known how much they appreciate me and my efforts. I don't know what to do about it, or if feeling like that is normal?

    I've felt exactly this way before too. It's disappointing and frustrating to be willing to give alot to someone and have them not reciprocate (or even take advantage of you). As far as my vote goes, feeling like that is completely normal (unless of course we're both on the crazy train...? *hug*). It's frustrating to hear at first, but giving it time is really what heals you.

    If having the brief company of someone new works for you, then I say do what makes you happy - just make sure you're not hurting someone else (you don't seem like the type who would though :))

    Just try your best to be patient with your feelings (patience is not one of my virtues, so I understand it's really hard) and keep yourself busy with your friends/family, work/school, and the things you love to do. You really will start to feel more and more like yourself. And once you're back to you, you'll be ready for the person who really deserves what you have to give! :thumb:
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