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merhhh!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
just suffering from some verbal diarrhea and to speel out here and maybe get some answers. feel free to comment.

been feeling rather lonely for some time but its been getting me down and affecting my work. even though i stay in work for hours than i need i just can get the motivation to do any thing and people would be talking to me about different things like what they did at the weekend and i just cant connect with them etc.

I struggle with forming relationships and being intimite with someone is far too much work for me to bother with it, i can deal with a degree of physical intimicy as i love hugs and cuddles but any further and emotional intimicy is the biggest bane of my life.
i have found that i have been pushing people away without realising it - several have said that i have basically become emotionless but i think i have previously mentioned that i do struggle in showing emotions and sharing peoples feelings too.

i have tried to form strong relationships before but i struggle in social interaction aspects and the intimicy avoidance - even to those that matter most to me. they get fustrated cause i faill in communicating my feelings etc and i also get fustrated in my lack in ability in these concepts.

Is there anyone else that struggle with loneliness, intimicy and emoition coveyance? if so how do you conquer it or adapt?

cheers

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    LauraOLauraO Posts: 535 Incredible Poster
    Hey K-Dwagg,
    I am going to move this over to the relationships forum as I think you'll get a few more replies there :)
    LauraO
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Loneliness is something that we all experience at some point - whether you've drifted apart from close friends or you're feeling like no one really understands you so you end up spending a lot of time in your own head thinking about things.

    Being self-aware is great and you've clearly identified some things you want to change but you're just not sure where to start :chin: There's perhaps something to be said for jumping outside of your comfort zone once in a while and forcing yourself to take a leap or face a fear that you might have. Perhaps you're avoiding certain social situations or worried about what other people think of you?

    The mental health charity Mind have a really good fact sheet on loneliness that you might like to read: http://www.mind.org.uk/help/diagnoses_and_conditions/loneliness These practical tips for example might help to pull you out of this bubble at the moment:
    Make the most of every opportunity for social contact, however slight. Talk to shopkeepers, don't ignore a fellow passenger who tries to start a conversation with you. Ask questions. Be curious.

    It may be that some talking therapy might help you to understand your issues with communicating your emotions or considering an intimate relationship. Opening up to people makes us vulnerable and that can be really scary but also really gratifying when you do develop those strong bonds.

    Is this something you have always struggled with? Maybe think to a time where you felt more on top of things or happy in a situation and think about what that was and what you might be able to do at the moment to get that feeling back?

    *hug*
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