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Hugging

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've put this in 'Relationships' because I think it's relevant to that section.

The topic in question is hugging, and it was the 'hugs' thread that got me thinking. I have an issue with hugging in that I only like hugs from people that I'm physically attracted to. I'm uncomfortable with any and all other hugs. I was wondering if anyone else feels the same? If yes, share. If not then can you offer me some thoughts as to why I might be like this?

Hugs from family, in particular, REALLY make me uncomfortable. I don't have to be actively interested in someone to enjoy a hug from them but I have to at least be able to find them attractive or the hug just creeps me out. It makes me feel unnatural, uncomfortable, on edge, etc.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you embaraased with hugs?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you embaraased with hugs?

    Not embarrassed as such, they just make me feel uncomfortable. I guess there might be an element of self consciousness in there, yes, but mostly it's just that the hug makes my skin crawl and I don't know why.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nah, not with hugs, not at all. But it is custom over here to kiss your relatives (aunts, cousins, grand ma) on the cheek and even tho I do this with my friends I really do not like it with my relatives.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Personal space issue?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't like hugs from people most of the time. Doesn't matter who they are, friends or family. The only time I have really ever enjoyed them was when it was a bf or one time when I was so upset and someone just hugged me and told me it'd be fine. That's the only time I have been comfortable with it. I think it's a personal space/self image issue for me. Could it be the same for you?
    It's annoying though at times, because more often that not now I just want a proper hug!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    People who are in my 'circle' can hug me, no one else can. For me it is definitely a personal space issue, and why I'm thankful to have been born british- we shake hands not lean in for a kiss or other intrusive practice.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its not that wierd - I don't mind hugs but it does depend who its from etc

    I once went to a meeting in Latin America where we all had to do a group hug at the end and i found i really odd and couldn't get into it at all and pretty much tried to avoid hugging anyone - which was noticed so i kind of said i was english and it wasn't really something i felt comfortable with, however my line manager did bring up that I wasn't getting into the spirit of things enough and that i should have more actively joined in the hugging.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katralla wrote: »
    People who are in my 'circle' can hug me, no one else can. For me it is definitely a personal space issue, and why I'm thankful to have been born british- we shake hands not lean in for a kiss or other intrusive practice.

    I'm British and have friends from different countries. I've noticed that Brits seem to shake hands (although, some will hug and /or kiss me - but we've known each other for several years) and I've noticed that some of the foreign people tend to hug or kiss. Which, after meeting someone once, I find somewhat odd.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's a notable cultural difference.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'll hug (and be hugged by) just about anyone.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe I was just forced to hug too many people as a child, lol. I do remember always feeling self conscious about hugging and/or kissing (on the cheek) people when I was little. I still feel that same feeling, it's just awkward. However, when it comes to family it verges on repulsive.

    I guess everyone is wired up differently.

    As a quick aside, it was interesting to see a little debate about handshakes on BBC Breakfast this morning. Of course I have no issue with handshakes as a formal greeting. I just hate ones that are too firm or too limp :S The hand crusher handshake is too testosterone fuelled for my liking. The limp squid handshake just feels plain weird o___O
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'll hug (and be hugged by) just about anyone.

    Yeah, but you're a tart.

    I like hugs, but on my own terms. If I'm not feeling up for a Super Long Hug, and someone tries to give me one, I get really uncomfortable, but sometimes that's just what I need.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    One of the funny quirks from having lived abroad is that I still think a hug and kiss both cheeks is a perfectly reasonable greeting. As such, have no problem hugging anyone really.

    Some people are uncomfortable being close to others, which is fine, as long as you're reasonable about it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'll hug (and be hugged by) just about anyone.

    I do too. Apart from the time a friend was minging of sweat from jumping about. (we'd been at a gig) :yuck:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Melian wrote: »
    I do too. Apart from the time a friend was minging of sweat from jumping about. (we'd been at a gig) :yuck:

    I actually really like hugging excessively sweaty people :o
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I actually really like hugging excessively sweaty people :o

    Ewww :s
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stu147 wrote: »
    Ewww :s

    :blush:
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